Author: James

James grew up in a house where Friday night was Movie night, which meant that he’d watched more movies than anybody else his age before he was even old enough to watch the rated R ones. He’ll watch just about anything, though he tends to avoid the horror movies without a sense of humor. Among his favorite movies are: Alien, Fargo, True Romance, Ed Wood, and Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark. He’s a die-hard LOST fan and a Brown Coat. As a writer, story usually comes first for James. Memorable characters and sharp dialogue are the things that separate the classics from the chaff. That said, he does his best to keep having fun at the movies. He’s seen plenty of critics who would once have accepted summer blockbusters as entertainment become jaded and nit-picky. Sure James loves the art of film and storytelling, but fun comes first, the fun that he had watching Raiders when he was little. Also, E.T. scares the pants off him.

Set Visit: The Boy Who Stares

BoyWhoStaresHeaderLast week we were invited to come visit the set of Zach Eastman’s new short The Boy Who Stares as they were filming here in Denver. Eastman was on our show for our Burt Wonderstone review, along with actors Spencer Kane and Matty O’Connor. At the time they were promoting the release of Twombley but we spent most of the time talking about their work in pre-production on The Boy Who Stares. I could tell that this was a passion project for Eastman, not just a film with a story he wanted to tell but a film where he was searching for something himself. One of my favorite young directors right now, Jason Reitman, has said that he chooses projects that are asking questions he doesn’t know the answer to, which I think makes his films feel like they are taking us through the struggles of an issue without mercy and leaves us having to decide for ourselves how we feel. While I’ve only seen snippets of Eastman’s new film I can’t seem to get away from the idea that this is the kind of film Eastman is making.

DSC_0108The Boy Who Stares is inspired by Eastman’s experience at the Century 16 shooting last summer. While not in that auditorium, he was in the theater that night, and being so close to a tragedy like that propelled him to make a film about a school shooting. While not from Colorado Eastman respected how close that topics was to locals. He read Dave Cullen’s book Columbine, and while by chance they ended up shooting on the anniversary of the shooting, it’s clear from what I’ve seen of the movie so far that Eastman neither being exploitative or pulling punches. In order to get permission to film at Herritage High School they had to prove that this wasn’t a film that was going to celebrate the violence, it was going to tell the story from a humanist experience. Matty O’Connor, who plays shooter Hector Creech, expressed some hesitation on our show at the idea that he was going to be playing Creech on the anniversary but still hoped that he could use that as motivation in his scenes. Knowing all this, when Eastman invited us to visit his set we jumped at the chance.

DSC_0135Brad was lucky enough to be an extra in one of their scenes at the courthouse, but I wasn’t there. I attended the filming of a scene between Spencer Kane and Cougar Littlefield. Littlefield plays Sam Blaine, a man who was at the shooting and came face to face with the killer; and Kane, a writer doing research for a story years after the shooting, comes to interview him. It’s a powerful scene where Littlefield takes us through the feelings of guilt and anger that haunt many of the people who experience violence like this. Littlefield’s performance is enthralling and I can’t wait to see it in the final cut. One of the things that struck me the most being on set was the way that each take could emphasize slightly different aspects of Littlefield’s character. When dealing with emotions as complex as a resentment towards his own healing process or the healing processes of others, it requires great subtly and control to keep the character’s motivations clear, and Littlefield seemed able to tweak the message in each take, giving Eastman room to work out the best way to get his story across to the audience once he gets into the editing room. It was impressive to watch and has kept me wondering since about all the other takes of great performances throughout the years that might not have been bad takes, but might have drastically changed the tone or direction of a classic scene. Seeing an actors performance from that side of the film’s production has really affected the way that I think about great actors and great performances.

DSC_0110The experience of being on a set really opened my eyes to how complex and professional these small, local film crews have to be. Sure these are all fun, laid back people who were nice to me and happy to have me there, but almost immediately I noticed there was a serious undertone running through everything. In our interview O’Connor joked about how unassuming they appear when they show up to ask permission to film somewhere, just two guys dressed nicely who want to make a movie, but then a truck full of equipment and a over a dozen crew members poor out and take over the joint.

This scene took place in Sam Blaine’s house, and so the crew had invaded the home of one of their friends and transformed it from a pleasant young woman’s house to a dark, messy den. Details that never even made it into the shots were paid close attention and while they were trying to make things look as cluttered as possible, there was a motivation behind many of the choices. Sure the crew was excited and having fun, but they were really there to work and they were trying to each bring their own flavor to the film. While the set was being built around them, the actors were going over their lines and Eastman was there tweaking their performances with a gentle hand. I honestly felt like he was constantly aware that he didn’t want to step on their toes, especially in a scene like this one with so much dramatic weight, but he still knew what he wanted to emphasize.

DSC_0187The camerawork was one of the things that impressed me the most. Director of Photography Walter Dandy was all business and I could tell how much he enjoyed what he was doing. I wish I’d had a chance to talk to him more but he was slinging around cameras and lenses, framing shots with one of those cool spyglass things, and I didn’t want to interrupt. Watching him and the rest of the crew felt like a crash course in filmmaking. Between shots they were talking about shots, they were looking for boom mic shadows on walls, and they were analyzing how new techniques were influencing the look of the film. Maybe the most fascinating moment was when they removed the mount from the tripod and rested the camera on a tennis ball instead—a technique Eastman told me they’d learned that day. They were open to experimenting with new ideas like that. Things weren’t all set in stone, it was a real collaborative effort.

DSC_0193I spent some time talking to Eastman about the project and about his relationship with this kind of violence and while I don’t think it’s my place to reveal exactly what he said I think it’s fair to say that he wants this film to express the deep wounds that these events cause and the truth that no matter how a person might be able to grow beyond being a victim they may never truly heal. I lived here during the Columbine shooting, my brother was at Highlands Ranch High School that day, I have friends whose older siblings were at Columbine, last year we lost our first great fan of the show, Alex Sullivan, in the Century 16 shooting, we interviewed his dad on our show and we continue to see him at comic stores around town. Over the last year I’ve realized that I’m closer to all this than I’d ever like to admit and while talking to Eastman I understood the ideas he was trying to struggle. We talked about movies that he was using as inspiration, Zodiac being one of the primaries, but little snippets of Eastman’s connection with the shooting would pop up. We talked about the trial and he said that a part of him feels like Jake Gyllenhaal’s character does when he says he just wants to see the zodiac in real life, to look him in the eyes. I asked him if he thought that he expected that to answer some question for him, to make it easier to understand and he said, “No.” Making sense of the violence doesn’t seem to be the goal here, making it feel real and shedding light on it’s impact does.

We’ll keep you posted as post production of The Boy Who Stares continues and we’ll let you know when you have a chance to see the film. Until then check out Eastman & Co.’s last film Twombley here below.

Thank you again to Zach Eastman, Spencer Kane, Cougar Littlefield, Walter Dandy, Anthony Cubba, and the rest of the crew for letting me sit in on their fun. And be sure to donate to Aurora Rise and support the victims of last year’s shooting in Aurora.

The Reel Nerds Teach Comics to Not Literally

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We may be a movie podcast but if you can’t already tell by listening to the show, we’re a movie podcast that wishes it was a comic book podcast too. That being said, when the fine ladies over at Not Literally decided that they wanted to learn more about comics as part of their Vlog Every Day in April project, we jumped at the chance. Loyal listeners should get ready to roll their eyes at James’ blatant influence over the choice of comics learned. What’s next, Ryan tells her about Spider-Man? Yes, probably. That’s probably next.

Subscribe to their channel and stay tuned here to see us talk about The Gaurdians of the Galaxy, Thanos, The Wolverine, and much more in the weeks to come!

Tom Sullivan and All C’s Help Aurora Victims

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Last year when we interviewed Tom Sullivan he made it clear to us that he was interested in doing whatever he could to help the other victims of the theater shooting in Aurora where he lost his son. Now, teaming up with the local comic shop that he and Alex used to go to, they’ve created a permanent charity to help their community in a long-term way.

You can check out their site and donate at AuroraRise.org and see their interview on CBS here.

Aurora Rise has already received donations of art and collectible covers from comic book artists that they will be auctioning off at Denver Comic Con so be sure to check them out there and support them however you are able.

Not Literally Dances Through Time with Doctor Who

Finally the fine ladies over at Not Literally have hit a nerve with those of us not indoctrinated into the world of Potter. Don’t be lame, check it out, fellow Whovians!

Apple Falls into an Old Trap. Censors Comics.

 

lyingcatUpdate:

Well, I didn’t think we’d be printing a retraction so soon in our careers, but here it is. Today it was revealed that Brian K. Vaughan statement that Apple was censoring Saga was false. It was in fact Comixology that was misinterpreting the rules given to them by Apple that caused Comixology themselves to choose not to release the book. Cooler heads than mine prevailed, including the seasoned writer Josh Flanagan over at iFanboy whose article today explains how this happened and his take on the response by the inflammatory internet–that includes me.

I’m sorry to have added to the anger and confusion yesterday.

What follows is the article as originally posted. While the circumstances have clearly changed, the history is certainly still true.

So as not to be a hypocrite: Warning! Mature Content!Saga12Cover

Earlier today Brian K. Vaughan posted a press release stating that the next issue of their book Saga was not going to be available for purchase through any iOS apps. Apple chose not to allow retailers like Comixology to sell the issue because of the adult content featured within. As digital distribution of comics is still suffering from birthing pains, this battle against censorship was inevitable, though while I expected it to be Apple against somebody I wouldn’t have dreamed it would have been against Saga or Brian K. Vaughan.

Apple is no longer a medium, they are a retailer but without the benefit of the sixty-plus years of retail experience that most comic shops either have or have inherited. This means that before I get angry—hard as that is to quell—I need to remember that they are approaching this issue from a place of ignorance, having not survived perhaps the worse occurrence of government induced censorship that the United States has ever endured. They are making the same mistakes that were made in the Fifties. So let’s very quickly educate the completely unaware.
CrimeSuspense22CoverIn the mid-Fifties there was an explosion of paranoia surrounding comics as parents, educators, and law-makers around the country began to really examine what kind of content was in the comics that they were reading. This was somewhat fueled by the growth of the horror comics genre, an extremely popular genre at the time that covered everything from True Crime to fantastic monsters. True Crime—often something of a misnomer since it was mostly fiction or sensationalized for shock value—was used as the tip of the spear plunged into the side of comics. Under the most scrutiny was William Gaines and EC Comics, most visually for their cover to Crime SuspenStories issue 22, which despite his best efforts Gaines was never able to properly defend while being questioned publicly on the stand. Rather than spending any real time collecting data or, better yet, properly monitoring what their children read and properly refusing to buy comics for them that clearly featured mature content, parents and law-makers listened to a man named Frederick Wertham. Wertham was a doctor who’d written a book called The Seduction of the Innocent. It gathered the data from his investigations into the effects of violent comics on children and concluded that comics were “a contributing factor in many cases of juvenile delinquency.” All this data has since been debunked as bad science gathered by a man who had an agenda rather than a pure curiosity. Laws were eventually passed stating that comics couldn’t contain images of violence, sex, or crime. These laws were quickly revoked by the supreme court for being unconstitutional but not before laying the groundwork for the creation of the Comic Code Authority which would stifle the medium for the next twenty-five years. This organization eventually broke down around 1986, starting a new era of comics heralded in by Watchmen and The Dark Knight Returns, two of the finest pieces of comic book art and literature that the medium has ever known. Ever since, the comic book industry has been wary of censorship, maybe even overly sensitive on the subject, while also struggling to find ways to avoid facing censorship like that again by instituting their own rating systems—like the one Comixology uses to label Saga for Mature Readers—in an attempt to make shopping easier for parents; though that system is not good enough yet, in my opinion.

But enough history, lets take a second to consider the content that has provoked Apple today. Obviously the issue isn’t out till tomorrow so I can’t actually show it to you, but according to Vaughan it is “two ‘postage stamp-sized’ depictions of gay sex.”

More appropriate than gay sex.

More appropriate than gay sex.

 

Is this adult content that children shouldn’t see? In my opinion, yes. But Saga is an adult book. It’s had content like this before. There is nudity on the fifth page of the first issue and a two page, detailed sex scene halfway through that issue leaving little to the imagination—other than wondering what those people would look like if they didn’t have televisions for heads. Provided that Vaughan’s description isn’t a lie, I’m left to think that Apple must only have a problem with issue 12 for one of two reasons: because it is homosexual sex, or because the panels are so small on the page that it cannot really be enjoyed as the erotic material that Apple believes it was intended to be. And upon further review it must be that second issue, the one about size, and not the fact that it’s a homosexual sex act because they must know that Vaughan’s magnum opus Y: The Last Man—which is also available for purchase on Comixology though not adapted for mobile viewing—features a panel more than half the size of the page of two women having sex. So maybe women having sex is okay but if it’s men then it’s dangerous. Except that I can buy Brokeback Mountain on the iTunes store. Hmm…

GhostGirlSagaLet’s give Apple the benefit of the doubt, however, and presume that this is something more graphic than simply nudity and horizontal body placement—though I seriously doubt it. If that’s true then we get into two arguments: one is that there is plenty of content equal to or worse that is accessible on their devices, and the other is the classic question of why sexual content is so much more unacceptable than violence. The second issue is one that better writers than I with far more research have spent countless pages discussing and while I’m not even sure how I feel about it or why, it doesn’t change the fact that in this country sex is worse than violence. The ghost girl in Saga who died getting her bottom half torn off and whose entrails hang out under her as she floats around caring for our characters’ newborn is always going to be more acceptable than sex—though that’s a bad example because that undead girl is so cute and lovable.

No it’s the first question that offers a treasure-trove of argument. Apple is spending time censoring comics but it does not however censor the internet, which the porn crazed children clamoring for tiny swashes of animated sex could much more easily just ask Siri to collect for them—I checked, she will. The content in this issue is something Apple believes they shouldn’t be a part of distributing to you, but you can get similar or worse content in other ways through their devices. And it’s not simply that censoring the internet is too hard a job because they are selling similar content on their own store, so the only conclusion left is that they are doing this to comics and not other mediums because when it’s a movie it’s art and when it’s a comic it’s for children.

What a monumental failure of imagination on their part.

I'm honestly not afraid of this happening again soon.

I’m honestly not afraid of this happening again soon.

Apple exists in a very bizarre place here. They aren’t really the retailer, they are the medium. They build the machine and the operating system by which people access other retailers and consume content. They aren’t simply saying that they choose not to sell something because of its content, they are telling another retailer that they can’t sell that content because it’s their device being used to consume that content. They have no reason to fear this content because Comixology, Image Comics, and even Brian K. Vaughan are responsible long before they are. But while I absolutely believe that they have the right not to sell content they see as being in bad taste, as does any retailer, I also believe that I have the right to call them ignorant for it. I have the right to refuse to buy products from them because of the way they treat both their consumers and their business partners. They aren’t doing this because they are afraid of the ramifications on them, they are doing this for the same reasons that reactionary mothers fearing their son’s might turn into ax-murderers did sixty years ago. As William Gaines exclaimed back then in one of his own protest comics, “It isn’t that they don’t like comics for THEM! They don’t like them for YOU!”

In an age where knowledge is free, where the consumer demands content the way they choose to have it, this kind of infantile and haphazard censorship needs to be left behind.

Now before I go I don’t want you to think that I’m saying that all content should be handed over to kids just because I’d hate for Vaughan to censor himself or for him to make a little less money because his readers are inconvenienced. That’s not true. Instead I’ll end with two sections from David Hajdu’s book on the subject, The Ten-Cent Plague:

In discussion of Walter Geier’s choice to write romance comics.

“’I thought romance is a complicated subject, and young girls are pretty smart, probably smarter than boys. So I tried to give them something worthy of their attention.’ In a rare instance when he received a response to one of his story-length synopses, an editor told Geier, “Don’t overdo it—remember, you’re writing for the chambermaid in the hotel.” Geier ignored him.

“’That really bothered me,’ Geier said. ‘I don’t know about chambermaids, but I was still pretty young then, and the young girls I knew weren’t stupid.’”

 In discussion of Frederick Wertham’s book.

“Equally patronizing in his treatment of those who created comics and those who bought them, Wertham never wavered from the promise of his title; he portrayed comic-book readers exclusively as innocents, describing virtually all readers of titles of all kinds as ‘children.’ Wertham was correct to note that the very young had access to every type of comic book on the newstand, and he pointed out, usefully, that warnings such as the ‘For Adults Only’ label that Fox used on its most lurid comics were likely an enticement to the wrong readers. If Seduction of the Innocent encouraged some parents to keep copies of Stanley P. Morse’s Weird Chills out of third-graders’ hands, Wertham performed a worthy service. At the same time, his obdurate initialization of the comics readership was inaccurate and tactical, rather than scientific. It diminished the adolescents and young adults who turned to comics in part because the books represented an escape from childhood, a way to begin dealing with the mysteries, the titillations, and the dangers of adulthood while reading safely in their bedrooms, under the covers.

“’To me, the most offensive thing about [The Seduction of the Innocent] was that [Wertham] presumed that everybody who read comics was a child or an idiot,” said Al Feldstein. “We [at EC] functioned out of a presumption that our readers were at least fourteen, maybe thirteen, and older—up to adulthood, through adulthood. Mature readers, in terms of comic books. That never occurred to [Wertham]. That never occurred to a lot of people who didn’t understand comics. Our readers were more mature. They were almost adults,. Or on their way there, that’s why they were coming to us.”

The unfortunate truth is that these days the majority of comic-book readers are adults, but even for the ones who aren’t, the people who should be deciding what children have access to is their parents, for better or for worse. We should raise the expectations for parents to be present in their children’s lives and—even in an era of information overload like the one Apple thrives in—actively choosing content for their children rather than swinging open the floodgates and blaming artists or retailers for their own apathy. And for parents with older children that they believe are more mature and able to handle or understand adult content, that should be their choice too. What I haven’t addressed yet is that Vaughan explains in his post that this adult content isn’t in Saga #12 for shock value, it has a purpose in the story. For all we know this issue could open up a dialog among some families with mature children whose parents choose this story to be one that shapes the kind of person they’ll be. Heaven forbid that we allow a mature content to get in the way of telling a story about love and heroes, bravery and adversity, war and death, life and pain, and the adventure that ties it all into our lives. Heaven forbid we keep stories like that from shaping young adults.

TenCentPlagueCoverIf you want to know more about the comic-cook scare in America I highly recommend David Hajdu’s Book, The Ten-Cent Plague: The Great Comic-Book Scare and How it Changed America.

SH*T SH*W REV*EW: Sand Sharks

This whole idea to review movies like these began with our DVD Releases segment on the podcast. Each week when I went through what was coming out that next Tuesday I always scrolled to the bottom to see what things nobody cared about, and what I noticed what just how many shark movies get tossed to the bottom of bargain bins each year. It sometimes felt like there was one every week. But when I saw the cover of Sand Sharks I knew I needed to see it. And when Ryan texted me and said Sand Sharks was on Netflix, I dropped what I was doing and started wasting my time. After that I knew I needed to start doing this blog series, so it’s only fair that Sand Sharks get its own entry.
 
Entrepreneur Jimmy Green has borrowed money from the mob to fund a Spring Break Party on the island that he called home growing up only to find that the beach where he wants to party is infested with a brood of young sharks specially adapted to swim through the sand like it was water. Jimmy struggles to navigate the treacherous sands berween against his ex-girlfriend and her brother—sheriffs of the island—the mayor, a woman from the mob sent to protect their investment, and the deadly sand sharks. People get eaten, there’s dancing, and a guy named Angus fires a flamethrower fueled with napalm.
 
“Are you serious right now?” “As a heart attack… or a shark attack.”
 
Sand Sharks gains points for having built in the makings of a drinking game. It appears that once the script was finished it was given to to another writer whose assignment was simply to work in as many shark puns as possible. Everything ‘bites’, every argument ends with someone saying they had their head bitten off, and beach parties are ‘to die for.’ Some of the puns are awkwardly forced into phrases that don’t even make sense, like ‘you really are a shark-tongued devil’ or ‘we’re kinda stuck between a rock and a shark place.’ These lines are so ridiculous that the only thing that could make them better is if each one were accompanied by a shot.

“You know that this isn’t a party that ends at midnight, it’s you life!”
 
If I thought Brooke Hogan was brilliantly bad in 2-Headed Shark Attack that is only because I didn’t realize how under-utilized she was in that movie. Here she plays Sandy Powers, the daughter of some  kind of super shark scientist who was killed by sharks since the last time that this island called him for help with a shark attack. What’s great about her in this movie is that she spends sixty-percent of her dialogue talking about how she needs to do more tests, “carbon dating, DNA, stuff like that.” I don’t know how a DNA test is going to tell her anything about the shark, but she sure does talk about DNA tests often and apparently it reveals how the sharks scales turn into suction cups and grip each grain of sand while also drawing moisture from them… or something important like that.
 
There are some genuinely fun things about this movie. I really mean that. Jimmy Green is ham-fisted and silly but there is something about Corin Nemec’s performance that is just the right level of over the top. When Jimmy goes to the pier to get everyone to evacuate and he sees two kids—who, by the way, watched a girl get eaten only minutes ago but somehow don’t know that they aren’t safe on the beach—and he screams to get them to run away. The scene is clearly improvised and they allow it to go on so long that when he finally says, “Oh my God, you guys are idiots” it’s genuinely funny. The character is stupid and corny and cliché but there are times when all that is in balance and you’ll actually smile a little at stupid lines of dialogue. Jimmy also finds ways to be distracting the the background of scenes, just acting goofy and drawing attention away from everything else that’s just a normal kind of stupid. I’m not saying I want to see a sequel with this guy in it… I’m just trying my best to say something good about the movie.

The last great character that graces us with his presence is Angus, the shameful replication of Quint from Jaws. He first shows up at the town meeting, just like the actual Quint, and gives a speech about how much he knows about the sharks and that he can catch and kill them, “hook, line, and sinker”—which is completely the wrong idiom for the situation but he just keeps saying it. Maybe the most creative line in the movie is when Angus shows up at the end to usher us into the third act, shouting about killer sharks, and the sheriff asks, “Are you ever seen before you’re heard?” It’s a funny little commentary on that kind of scene transition.
 
I’ve said too many good things about this movie, you’re going to start thinking that it isn’t any fun to watch. This movie is full of dumb. One of the guys who works for Jimmy says he can “crash the internet” and when he tries to prove it he causes the lights in the room to flicker. Right after watching someone get eaten, Jimmy’s dad walks out onto the beach and starts yelling about how he’s tired of all these sharks and that he’s “drawing a line in the sand” and then of course he gets eaten and Jimmy is very sad. The ex-girlfriend cop gets bitten in half yet survives long enough to call Jimmy a jerk as he tries to push her guts back together to keep her alive. This is one of those moments when his ridiculousness is in perfect balance. At that same time the Sheriff and Dr. Sandy Powers are stuck on a rock in the middle of the beach and when Jimmy tells them on the walkie that his sister was bitten in half the Sheriff goes off on Jimmy only to forgive him seconds later. Don’t worry about them by the way, the next time they are needed they will simply show up and when asked how they got off the rock they’ll explain that they “got away.” Did I mention that one of the reasons that the town is hesitant to let Jimmy throw the party is that the last time he did this fifteen people died. They never say what they died from, clearly it wasn’t sand sharks, so I assume that it was just that they partied so hard that they died from over-exposure to partying. Speaking of which once the party starts there are only about thirty people there and the stage is less impressive than a cheap booth at a second rate convention. If something that insignificant can boost the island’s economy like Jimmy promises it will I think they might be better off setting up a lemonade stand, provided they can borrow the pitcher from their parents.

The sharks here are particularly bad. They hardly look like sharks by the way they are designed which only makes the CG stand out even more. Most of the time the sharks are simply seen as fins in the sand, which at least leave a trail wherever they go, but that means the only actual animation is when the sharks jump out of the sand and beach themselves to eat someone. The most we actually see the sharks move is at the end when the really big one—big enough that its dorsal fin is popping out of the top of the nearby ridge—pops up inside of the shack, suddenly much smaller, and wiggles its head back and forth… menacingly! Then Brooke Hogan throws a jar of napalm in its mouth and it explodes.
 
“Eat this you sand of a bitch!”
 
The most jarringly bad part of the movie is the end. They try to draw the sharks to a part of the beach where there is a shack they can hide in while they shoot the sharks with napalm (as I’ve noted before, it’s always fire). But the place where they film the shack and the place where the sharks congregate are clearly two different places filmed as if we wont notice. In a final moment of heroism, Jimmy runs out and attracts the sharks to him by singing Row Row Row Your Boat and then letting them eat him.

“Until then your party isn’t on the sand… it’s on the ice.”
 
And the final score is: 4 out of 5. This movie is really bad in many great ways. From the bad puns and the worse creature effects to the languid set-up for anti-climactic nudity and violence, Sand Sharks is actually pretty funny to watch. Some of the acting and writing manages to actually be palatable enough that it makes the down time between shark attacks watchable. All this would probably only get it a 3 normally but since the points don’t really matter I’m giving it a boost for being on Netflix Instant and being a movie that you could drink to, though honestly if you did a shot every time they made a shark pun you might put yourself in danger. So Have FUN!
 
SH*T SH*W REV*EW will return with Transmorphers 2: Fall of Man 
It won this honor by using modem sounds in the trailer.
– James Hart
Have a bad movie you think I might love. Leave it in the comments below.

SH*T SH*W REV*EW: Pinata: Survival Island

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When I decided to start writing these reviews of the film world’s version of ‘shovel-wear’, starting with Two-Headed Shark Attack a few weeks ago, the first film I put on my ever-expanding list of potentials was Piňata: Survival Island. I’ve seen Piňata about half a dozen times in my life because there was a spring break during college when it was on late night tv every night… so what else was I going to do but watch it. Now I’m a proud owner.

“Oh, scary… Let’s open you up there, big guy.”

Piňata: Survival Island starts with a convoluted origin of an evil Piňata. Joaquim de Almeida narrates the story of a magical shaman in an ancient village who builds a clay Piňata to house all the sins of the villagers. Note: If this sounds like something you’d be interested in attempting, the movie gives you exact instructions about what pig parts should be used and how, as well as the construction of a good-luck Piňata, and the details of performing the required ritual. Educational attributes will not affect the film’s final score. The Piňata is then set adrift in the ocean where it gets struck by lightning, which… probably… gives it powers or something. Where might the Piňata run aground??

We join our party of boating college students on their way to an island to celebrate Cinco de Mayo by doing an underwear scavenger hunt put on by the greek community at their college. The frat brothers and sorority sisters are handcuffed in pairs and sent out onto the island to gather undies. Kyle (Nicholas Brendon) and Tina (Jaime Pressly) just went through a breakup but they end up handcuffed together, which would be the worst of their problems if a pair of loopy pot-smokers didn’t come across a clay demon statue and try to break it open, hoping that it’s filled with underwear. Then people die!

“And when we cracked it, we heard a sound like we were letting out the pain and suffering of an entire village. I had no idea how to describe it until you just put it into words. We thought it was because we were high but that is exactly what it sounded like.”

The best things about this movie are tied into that ridiculous premise. I don’t know what the actual origins of the modern, candy-filled piňata are, but if I found a clay demon statue on an island I wouldn’t immediately call it a piňata. Any time the piňata is on screen its comedy gold without hardly doing anything. It spends most of its time walking around the jungle watching people harvest underwear, we spend plenty of time watching close-ups of its footsteps and repeated animations of the demon walking, or eventually flying—because eating souls causes it to evolve—and when it does descend upon our victims it usually just bashes their heads in with a shovel. He does rip one guys heart out and tries to kill another with his magical boomerang club, but that’s as creative as it gets. It’s clear that they use a guy in a suit for most of the shots where we see the whole creature, but they have a more articulate head that they use for extreme close ups, and the attacks are mostly done by a CG entity. The worst thing about this is that because the guy in a suit can’t articulate his face it seems they resorted to just distorting the image to make it look like the creature has some life. As the movie moves forward they rely on this idea that the piňata can change, using an entirely CG version instead, and eventually teaching it to fly so that they can save on animation.

As you expect we get some pretty ridiculous scenes. While running away from the piňata, one woman feels it is necessary to slowly walk along a fallen long rather than simply jump over it, allowing her to dramatically fall over in slow-motion. Nicholas Brenden has a scene where he retells the entire opening origin story from memory, I guess because he studied Megonyo history in college. There is an ominous chapter break that decides we need to know that it is now May 6th. Maybe my favorite thing about this movie is how much the piňata loves trees and vines but can’t use them. It ties a noose around its neck twice, once to lure in victims who think it is a normal piňata, and again later to swing from the trees, turn one hand into a knife and cut a girl’s head off while her friend pees nearby. It even strings a guy up with fake looking hobby store vines while he stops to get a rock out of his shoe.

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No SH*T SH*W is really complete without seeing through the monster’s eyes. Here we get Piňata Vision!

“Time for us to stop being hunted and start doing the hunting.”

Like any other movie that doesn’t leave a way out for its characters, they resort to makeshift explosives to defeat the piňata. There is really no mention of a plan until the other remaining survivors start telling Kyle that they hope his plan works. Preparation involves a montage and an intense gas siphoning sequence, later followed up with a swinging kick and an equally intense gas pouring sequence. It turns out all they have to do is handcuff a molotov cocktail to the piňata’shead and it’ll explode. Then campus police show up and ask them what happened.

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“Someone, or something, is out there and it’s majorly fucked up.”

What’s not good about this movie might surprise you, it’s the acting… it’s too good. The parts of this movie that don’t involve the piňata demon are too serviceable. Movies like this are more fun when the dialogue is cringe-worthy and poorly delivered. Nicholas Brendon, Jaime Pressly, and the rest of the actors do their best to channel performances from a mid-nineties sitcom, which really takes the edge off of the majority of the scenes without the piňata. If this were really just a movie about an island possessed by a demon, if you removed all the piňata context, it wouldn’t be anywhere near as much fun.

I’m disappointed to say that I’m giving this movie a 3. I remembered it being much worse, and therefore much more fun to watch. But for as stupid as the premise is, most of the scenes are borderline watchable and there is too much time between the stupid sequences. If you had your friends over to watch Piňata: Survival Island, you would be doing it for the sake of saying you’d seen a movie about a killer piňata, not because you want to.

Oh, and GOOD NEWS EVERYONE! In my research I found that the entire film is on Youtube… so… if you feel like it:

– James Hart

SH*T SH*W REV*EW will return with another Brooke Hogan joint, Sand Sharks

Have you seen Piňata: Survival Island? Tell us what you think about it below!

SH*T SH*W REV*EW: 2-Headed Shark Attack

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I’m really not sure how to reconcile what I’m about to do. Our motto this past year has been “Want to like the movie” because I truly believe that cynicism is becoming far to prevalent in the film criticism world, it’s become too popular to hate things that other people like or that are just trying to be fun because it makes the critic look smart. But I’m starting a series here that I’ll return to throughout the year where I’m gonna hate on stuff. But not just any stuff, this stuff is real, genuine shit that no one has delusions about being good—except, it appears, maybe Brooke Hogan. If you’ve been listening to the show, you know that I love torturing myself with really bad films, and I love the idea of bad shark movies with low budgets and silly premises, but I haven’t seen enough of them. So I’m about to get educated.

2-Head Shark Attack

“It’s got two heads.” 

“Two Heads is twice as many Teeth!”

You know what’s scarier than a two-headed shark? Two sharks.

2-Headed Shark Attack drops a boat full of students who are studying… sextants?… into the waters around an unstable atoll where a mutated shark with two heads has been eating water-skiers two at a time. When they come upon the carcass of a large shark that the shark-and-a-half has killed, they accidentally guide it into their propeller, punching a slow leak in the hull, and they are forced to evacuate to the atoll. This is the point where you look up the definition of an atoll, since this one is apparently sinking because the two-headed shark keeps running into the corral supporting it. As they plunder the island for “scrap metal” to fix the boat they find plenty of reasons to motor back and forth between the atoll and the ship so that the shark has more opportunities to pick them off.

There are “good” things about 2-Headed Shark Attack. Hmm… no, let’s try again.

There “are” “good” “things” about 2-Headed Shark Attack. Better.

imageThe two heads of the shark have pronounced jowls that are either an homage to the design of Bruce from Jaws or evidence that the makers of 2-Headed Shark Attack don’t know what sharks actually look like, so they just re-watched Jaws and modeled the shark heads after that. Note: I just realized how much better this movie would have been if one of the shark heads had an eyepatch and the other one had some missing teeth or a beard, so that they were individualized like a two-headed ogre. The other “good” “thing” about the CG is that it is sometimes actually unique to the scene taking place. What I mean is that in most Asylum movies they simply create a few CG animations for their creature and then reuse them, so that the monsters never actually feel like they are interacting with the scene. In 2-Headed Shark Attack they still reuse plenty of footage but they also have a sequence where the shark attacks a guy and throws him up in the air and slaps him with its 1-tail, and another shot where they attack someone and the two heads pull the victim apart underwater like the T-Rex’s (T-Rexi?) in The Lost World. It’s not particularly convincing, but it’s evidence that anyone tried. Part of the fun of the idea of a two-headed shark is what interesting ways it might kill someone, or that while the shark is eating someone you still aren’t safe, and at least 2-Headed Shark Attack “tries” to fulfill on that promise.

“The boat just needed a little tuning up. Now we just need gas.”

“We just found this gas can.”

“Is there anything in it?”

“It smells like gas.”

Asylum films are fairly desperate, but I’ve never seen them moving in the direction of straight to DVD American Pie films that make them money on teenagers who want to rent films full of nudity, until now. 2-Headed shark attack isn’t full of nudity, but it wants to be. I’ve never seen a director so excited to have Carmen Electra in their movie since Baywatch: White Thunder at Glacier Bay. There are a bizarre, if not creepy, number of shots of Electra laying on the deck of the ship in a bikini, zooming in and out like the eyes of a lusty animated wolf. Nine out of ten of the students are busty women who, if they aren’t wearing a bikini are either made fun of for their one-pieces, or are wearing a shirt that they later take off in order to cover one of the men’s wounds. Every minor occurrence is followed by multiple reaction shots of bikini clad ladies screaming or running. Especially if the law suits against Asylum continue, then in three years these movies will have titles like Shark Attack in the Grotto or Busty Beauties get Hammer-Head.

“Once this atoll sinks, we will be.”

If you’re like me and you love these bad movies, there are plenty of funny scenes to appease you. The excruciatingly long topless makeout sequence ends with both the fine young ladies attacked by the shark-and-a-half. The shark doesn’t eat them though, it apparently has some kind of power to cause them to spasm and cough up blood before falling over in waist high water. Considering the depth of the water the shark can use this power from at least thirty-five feet away. As can usually be expected there is plenty of disembodied dialogue, clearly added in post, but what’s great about it here is usually that kind of ADR is to clarify clunky plot points, like someone yelling “it’s being drawn towards the electro-magnetic pulse of the welder,” but there are also some lines that are clearly added and just as clearly unnecessary. And that’s another thing, there is a whole subplot about the shark being drawn to vibrations, but sometimes it’s electro-magnetic pulses, and in the end they just draw it in with blood… so none of that matters. Their final plan to kill the shark-and-a-half is to feed the shark a barrel of oil with a lit fuse in it… but the fuse is a guy’s shirt… which is soaked… and they actually say that they’ll wring it out… which wont do much good since while they try to light it the fuse the shirt is still floating in the water… and then they are surprised when it doesn’t work.

“I think it’s a Jellyfish.”

I genuinely think that Brooke Hogan thinks she is breaking in with these films. I think that she expects someone to see her irritable delivery of lines like, “fears don’t get over themselves” and hire her to be in their movies. I hope that doesn’t happen though, because I need her to return for 2-Headed Sand-Shark Attack.

I’m going to rate these movies on a scale from 1 to 5 based on how much fun they would be for you and your friends to watch drunk. 5 being something genuinely good but still crazy and knowingly tongue-in-cheek like Stephen Sommer’s Deep Rising, and 1 being a movie that is bad, but boring, like Dragonheart 2: More Dragons, or whatever that movie was called.

image2-Headed Shark attack gets an un-ironic 2. If the scenes didn’t feel like they dragged on so long and the attacks weren’t always preceded by what feels like eons of the shark’s approach then the movie might be higher. The acting is horrible, sure, but the real gem here is how deranged the plot-points are. This isn’t a bad movie to put on in the background while your friends are over, but it’s one you’ll find yourself drawing everyone’s attention to during the best-bad parts and then ignoring the rest of the time.

– James Hart

SH*T SH*W REV*EW will return with Pinata: Survival Island.

Seen 2-Headed Shark Attack? Tell me why in the comments below!

James Top 20 Films of 2012

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If you told me how far we’d come in 2012 last year this time last year I really wouldn’t have believed you. While I want to reiterate everything that Ryan said at the beginning of his list, I won’t, and this is The Internet so I can just do this: Bam! I also want to add that as great as this year has been, it’s also been rather heartbreaking. I’d like to thank Tom Sullivan for sitting down on our show and just for generally being an amazing person. 

Anyway, there’s plenty more talking to come, so lets start the list. These are my favorite films of 2012. These are Ryan’s. These are Brad’s. And This is where you can here us talk about them and more.

The opening sequence of Lincoln sets the stakes very high, repeating the promises of Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address to put the soul of America and the promise of democracy on the edge of a knife. This sense of urgency never leaves the film, and throughout every scene of political squabbling and marital grief, this acts as a driving force of what seem to be Lincoln’s deliberate and determined actions. It’s hard to make a movie where every scene is just people talking about politics or depression and have it be entertaining, but the weight of the subject at hand and the likability of the characters themselves propel us forward through a short two-and-a-half hours. On top of all that, what more can be said about Daniel Day-Lewis and Sally Fields’ performances? They are among the best actors of their generations and these are certainly among the best of their careers. Spielberg remains in an entirely different league. You cannot compare him to anyone but himself at this point, and when you see Lincoln you know that this will be one of the films he is most remembered for. This is art at its perfection.

This isn’t just the most crowd pleasing fun I had all year, this was also the fulfillment of a wish that seemed impossible. Mixing all these superheros from tonally different films seemed to guarantee that no matter how much fun the movie would end up being, it would always feel disjointed, but that didn’t happen. Mixing these characters together would be one thing, but most people would agree that this is actually the best versions of all those characters. The Incredible Hulk has never been done so well on film, Captain America is more fun and more interesting here than he is in his origin, Iron Man is as good as he always is, though we do get the end of his transition into a real hero who risks his life to save everyone, Black Widow and Hawkeye obviously get more development, I would only argue that Thor is a bit flat when compared against the dramatic scenes we saw in Asgard.


I was really looking forward to Cabin in the Woods but it was still the biggest surprise of the year because it was not at all what I expected it to be. Cabin is the Shaun of the Dead of American horror. It deconstructs a genre while also becoming an entry into it. Maybe more than anything on this list, see this movie.

I know, you probably hated this movie and I understand that, because the reasons why you hate this movie are the reasons why this isn’t my number one. This movie stuck with me, it made me think about it for weeks. I love the ideas that it plays with and the world that it inhabits. I love David, and the way he skirts morality because he doesn’t understand it. I love the quest for life and the idea that aliens might simply be uninterested in us. It’s a beautiful film and I want to see more big-budget, space-treking science fiction like it in the future.


I’ve be a devout fan of Rian Johnson since the credits first rolled on Brick and it’s been relly exciting to see the direction his career is taking. Looper is his first foray into action and science fiction and thankfully he didn’t loose his unique storytelling, quirky comedic timing and beautiful sense of motion. Looper does what most great sci-fi does, by taking an idea as simple as ‘what if you could sit down at a diner with your future self’ and exploring it literally, then it wraps itself inside of a cool action flick in order to become palatable. When the movie starts you never image that it will take you to the dark places that future Joe’s mission requires, and you certainly don’t think that you might be on his side when it does.

6. Beasts of the Southern Wild

It’s the sense of place that Beasts of the Southern Wild does so well that allows it to become so engrossing. From the dialect to the set decoration of the parade floats, the Bathtub is a real place, which makes Hushpuppy real, which makes her story real, and the emotional pull of her self-discovery ring true. To tell someone the plot of Beasts of the Southern Wild is a surprisingly brief act that brings to light just how important the way the story is told actually is.


After the first time I saw The Hobbit I was not expecting it to be on my top ten. It’s not that I thought the movie was bad, but it felt like their were pacing problems that kept me from really getting involved in the movie the way I did with The Lord of the Rings Trilogy. But what I discovered seeing it again was that all the questions about whether or not it would live up to the quality of the first trilogy, whether or not Radaghast would end up paying off throughout the trilogy, where they were going to split the films and whether that would seem satisfying, all those questions had kept me from actually letting myself enjoy it the first time. The second time I simply had fun. I liked watching the dwarves sing their songs and do dishes, and felt more of the tension as Spiders tried to invade Radaghast’s home, I got to know each of the dwarves a little better so that I actually cared about them, and I got invested in Bilbo’s search for courage and mercy. The movie isn’t perfect, and I think that a film should be able to stand on its own, but I also think that An Unexpected Journey can’t really be judged fairly until the story is completed, and if it eventually turns into a great trilogy, made better because the elements it sets us pay off so well, than I would regret dismissing it from this list for that reason.

8. Hitchcock

I wasn’t expecting to love Hitchcock as much as I did. It follows Alfred Hitchcock from deciding to make Psycho to releasing it and the personal problems he had along the way. While it doesn’t feel as much like air-tight history as Lincoln does, likely taking creative license with his marriage, the story that it tells is so fascinating that it begs you to forgive it. As much as I love Helen Mirren’s performance and was fascinated by the insight into the making of Psycho, the controversy surrounding it, and the inspiration for it, what actually hooked me on this film is the way in which it slowly adopts the tropes of a Hitchcock film, as intrigue begins to bleed into the story and character start communicating through and becoming suspicious of the most miniscule details, like the placement of an earring or a small collection of sand. This blend of genres along with a heartwarming story about a marriage torn apart by busy lives, old age and disinterest, a husband with a voyeuristic eye, and two artists trying to keep their work from becoming stagnant.


This isn’t a Spider-Man movie it’s a Peter Parker movie, and that’s why I think it’s better than the original Spider-Man trilogy. This really felt like the Peter Parker that I loved as a kid, that I still love, who is just a normal kid with problems who is thrust into greatness. There are so many great comic book franchises going right now but this is the one I am most excited to see a sequel to right now. If you can marry the great characters here with the drama of Gwen Stacy’s arch and the big action I expect from a sequel that isn’t weighed down by an origin story they might have one of the best superhero movies’ ever made.


This is the kind of kids movie I’m passionate about. Paranorman refuses to give in to the temptations of simple storytelling and simple lessons to teach. It addresses issues of being an outcast from different angles, turning zombies into sympathetic monsters and making villains out of outcasts who’ve grown to hate their bullies. Children aren’t dumb, they can understand complex ideas as long as they are told in a way they understand. There was a time when I dreamed of a year when my favorite animated movie wasn’t Pixar (because the bar was raised at other studios, not because Pixar stopped trying so hard) but Laika makes it really easy to love Paranorman. The animation is stunning and the work that clearly went into it shows a love for filmmaking that is too rare among kids flicks these days.


I love the Dark Knight Trilogy and the The Dark Knight Rises was a fittingly epic end to the story. Bane is not a villain I expected to see on film again after the appallingly bad Batman & Robin, but Nolan brings a new visual aesthetic and tone to the character that makes you impatient to see him again. No it didn’t make my top ten, neither did Skyfall, but that doesn’t mean that there’s something wrong with the film. It’s become really popular to rip apart these popular films for tiny errors of continuity or logic and the Dark Knight Rises has been among those unfairly scrutinized, but I do not heed to that. DKR is amazing, and cool, and fun and the kind of wish fulfillment that comic book fans never thought they’d get. 


Skyfall proved to me that a Bond film could reintegrate all the tropes of James Bond, the puns, the gadgets, the silly villains with their silly deformities and silly plans for world domination, but still be a smart film with great characters and grounded action scenes. I was really excited to see a director like Sam Mendes take on 007 and I was not disappointed. No one was.


This movie is great. Check out our award for Best Film of 2012 You Didn’t See to read my review.


The trailer for Seven Psychopaths looked really good, but it sold it as a quirky thief comedy about guys stealing dogs for ransom money, which sells the movie short. This might have been my favorite surprise of the year. It’s a crime comedy with an injection of Charlie Kaufman’s Adaptation and the quick dialog and interesting characters that Martin McDonagh is becoming known for.

15. The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel

This is a charming film about old people carving out a new life for themselves. As ordinary as that sounds, this one chooses to tell a few more difficult stories about how chance can be good for you while at the same time tearing apart everything that was once most important to you.

You’ve probably seen 21 Jump Street and there’s a good chance you saw it because a friend told you about how good it was. This year there were few movies with as strong word of mouth as this one. It would have been easy to make a simple, stupid movie out of the old 90’s series but thankfully someone along the line decided to both embrace and refuse to make such a movie. But you already know that… because as I said, you already saw it.

17. Safety Not Guaranteed
Safety Not Guaranteed is a charming comedy that allows Aubrey Plaza and Mark Duplass plenty of room show off. 

The Grey was an early surprise. Advertised as ‘Liam Neeson punch wolves with broken bottles’ I expected more action and survival, but what we got was a nihilistic movie about the way we approach difficulties in our lives.


This movie plays to my sensibilities: charming hill people, local folklore, bluegrass music. The story of cowardly Jack trying to find his place among his iconic brothers brought heart to a movie that could have easily just been a action film with dark and twisted villains. Jessica Chastain’s performance at the end of the film as she tries to keep Forrest from going to the bridge is enough to earn its place on this list.

20. Django Unchained

For me, Django shows a complete lack of restraint on Tarantino’s part, and while I still enjoyed it, the sloppy final act, including Tarantino’s embarrassing appearance in the film, squander all of the good will generated by the first two-thirds. It’s hard to follow up a film like Inglorious Basterds, and I kept reminding myself that Django was never going to achieve that level, but I never expected the movie to wander aimlessly as much as it does. 

The movies not on this list that may have affected it had I seen them are: The Master, Robot and Frank, and Smashed.

– James Hart

Am I a big dumb-dumb with a stupid-head list? Leave a comment below!

Trends of 2012 we Want to See More of

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High Frame Rate 3D

There is so much money tied up in 3D now that I’m really not sure if it’s going away anytime soon. That said, if it’s permanent I want it to be high frame rate. Visual effects photographer Douglas Trumbull has been on the leading edge of high frame rate photographer for over twenty years, shooting as high as 120 frames per second in order to create images that are so crisp that they become like 3D without the glasses. The Hobbit is the first time that a wide release blockbuster has been shot in 48 fps and the result, while jarring for some and certainly not perfect yet, is something worth experiencing. On the show we talked about some the the pitfalls, things felt like they moved too fast at first and the CG and live action appeared more disconnected, but the 3D itself was more convincing than anything I’ve seen before and if we remember that this is the first time this has been done, there is hope that solutions can be found for these issues. The 3D was so good in fact that when arrows were shot at the screen my eyes involuntarily spasmed as if they were actually afraid something was going to hit them. It also eliminated the pop-up book appearance of traditional 3D because the image is so crisp that objects gain weight and dimensions themselves, rather than being simply set apart from other objects. You almost notice the 3D less as a result. It becomes like looking into a window, which is what they’ve been telling us for years. Maybe it’ll never work right, but we want to see more films try.

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Cease and Desist orders against Asylum

Asylum is the company that produces the films that are meant to take advantage of the promotion of big budget films by naming their movies things like Transmorphers, American Battleship, Age of the Hobbits, Alien Origins, and then formatting the cover art to make the movie look like their blockbuster counterparts. I watched Alien Origins this year in the wake of Prometheus in order to make a point about the criticism settled against Prometheus by reviewing a film with no real value. Their movies skirt any content that might require actual production efforts and tend to be completely unaware of the story elements that make the blockbusters actually enjoyable. They’re clearly a kind of scam, which is why it’s exciting to know that major production companies are finally fighting back. It started with American Battleship, which got Asylum sued because it so closely resembles the promotional material for Battleship. After that, Age of the Hobbits was served a cease and desist order because of the use of the word ‘Hobbit’ which is a word actually coined by J.R.R. Tolkien in The Hobbit. It’s title now changed to Clash of the Empires, this may signal the end of Asylum.

Live Recorded Musicals

I really didn’t like Les Miserables but it wasn’t because of the singing or the performances. Whatever the direction and the musical itself might have done to try and ruin my enjoyment of it, still the way that recording the singing live on set allowed the singing to sound genuine has made the music from the last seventy years of musicals seem ethereal. There have always been times when you could tell that the music is per-recorded, but the argument has always been that there was no way else to do it, but that’s no longer true, and Tom Hooper proved it. Now, maybe the squared off, bland staging of the scenes was a result of the recording but probably not and if so another director will find a way to solve that. I don’t need polished audio and polished vocals, I need polished characters and heart-felt words.

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Smiling Kristen Stewart

Kristen Stewart is not very good, but we were convinced this year that if she would just put all her effort into smiling instead of the shallow brooding she always does she might just be able to carry a role rather than ruin it. I always argued that she was good in Adventureland, and I think that’s still true, but now I realize that it’s just a coincidence that the role actually called for that kind of behavior. I tend not to like the characters she plays because they never seem to enjoy anything. When she smiles, she’s having fun, and suddenly so am I. Plus, she’s actually pretty when she doesn’t look frumpy or high.

– James Hart

Is there something from this year you found really exciting but we missed it on this list? Leave a comment below, email us, or call, and we’ll talk about it on the show.

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