Grab your portable mini fans and spray bottles, folks. This article is going to be hotter than the last time your air conditioning unit broke; hotter than when you open up the oven door to grab your pizza when it’s done; hotter than walking down the Las Vegas strip on a July afternoon.

Trust me: you’re going to need an ice bath after this one, because I’m honoring the Top 10 Hottest Scenes in Cinema*.

You’re probably wondering: “Corinne, what’s with the asterisk?”

Well, a couple of things, really.

First, this list is subjective. The entries and their placement are my own opinions, but … c’mon. Once you read through it, you’re not going to be disagreeing with me. It’s entirely possible that there’s some steamy scenes in movies I’ve never seen… so if there’s anything I’ve neglected, feel free to bring it to my attention. Perhaps I’ll revisit the list, if I feel it’s warranted.

But, moreover, the asterisk really represents the qualifications for these entries — namely, that we’re playing by Bollywood rules, people. So there can be no kissing, no making out, no nothing! This is only G–rated stuff. Not to say a scene can’t be hot if the characters are kissing. There are plenty of examples I could give you from Casablanca to Notorious … but, sometimes the fact that they’re not kissing makes it even hotter, in my opinion.

It’s all that tension building up, and you’re rooting for these poor bastards to do something, literally anything, but they won’t because ~drama~ or something. Maybe they kiss later in the movie (and in most of these entries, they do). But, in these scenes, there’s something to be said for the chemistry between the actors, the dialogue, the pacing, the lighting, the mood — in short, everything — when the two love-struck dolts aren’t macking on each other. Again: tension-building.

So, without further ado, grab the nearest bottle of water and dump it on your head, because we’re diving right in with:

10. Charles follows Julia through the ship in Brideshead Revisited (2008)

This one is low on the list, to be sure, but it’s still enough to make you put a damp cloth on your forehead. (And, believe me, it’s low on the list for a reason.)

This sequence is almost the first scene in the movie, and really draws the audience into the mysterious and not-yet-revealed connection between these two. In the scene, Charles (played by Matthew Goode) is stewing in the mixed feelings of his recent success as a painter, which in some respects feels hollow to him. He’s aimlessly smoking a cigarette when he spots an attractive woman (whom we later find out is Julia, played by Hayley Atwell). There’s some unspoken connection between them; they make eye contact across a large room. She leaves. He follows her through the various parts of the cruise ship that they’re on. It ends with them standing in the doorway of her room, greeting each other for the first time in several years. And then we get probably an hours-long flashback-within-a-flashback sequence and find out how these two lovebirds met.

The pacing, the framing, the music, the set design and costumes, and performances all line up for a very memorable and intriguing scene that piques the audience’s curiosity while also demonstrating the unresolved tension between these two. And all without more than a line or two of dialogue.

9. “Let Me Teach You How to Dance” in Miss Potter

This is when we really start to get into the nitty-gritty of it all.

Miss Potter is adapted from the real-life story of author Beatrix Potter (played by Renee Zellweger), who doesn’t have much of a social life or any prospects in the way of love. But, she starts to form a connection with her up-and-coming publisher, Norman Warne (played by Ewan McGregor). The two spend a lot of time with each other, but always under the eye of Beatrix’s watchful chaperone. At a Christmas party, Beatrix invites Mr. Warne to her room to give him his present (calm down — it’s just a painting), her chaperone passes out from drinking too much, and he opens a music box playing the song “Let Me Teach You How to Dance.” And they proceed to … dance.

It’s all very innocent, but the fact that the man she loves is so close to her in such a intimate space and situation… she’s definitely blushing. And when you watch the scene, you’re like Kathy Geiss in 30 Rock cheering: “Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!”

And then of course, he tries to take the opportunity to propose to her, and she’s totally unprepared but also so emotional. And, just when you’re starting to fan yourself, her killjoy mom walks in and interrupts them. So close! Still, it’s such an emotionally charged scene, because you’re rooting for these two dumb-dumbs to say how they feel, and… well, I won’t ruin how Miss Potter ends, but, they really needed to say how they felt! Let’s just put it that way.

8. The rainy porch scene in Mogambo

Even though it’s raining in this scene, somehow it’s hotter than the Sahara.

Victor (played by Clark Gable) is a big-game hunter in Africa, and has been hired by Mrs. Nordley (played by Grace Kelly) and her husband to take them on an expedition to find gorillas. Before the Nordleys arrive, we see Vick’s womanizing ways, but when Mrs. Nordley does appear on the scene, Vick falls for her — hard. (Who can blame him? It’s Grace Kelly, after all!) After rescuing her from a trap in the jungle, he’s escorting her back to the main house. A storm comes up, with the wind blowing like crazy. Mrs. Nordley has trouble walking, and Vick picks up her in his arms and carries her back. On the porch, not a single word is spoken between them, but again — unresolved tension. They’re starting to get feelings for each other, but neither wants to admit it. She walks to the door of her room, but stops. He follows her. She’s wearing a headscarf, and he snaps it off her head and puts it around her neck, still holding it in his hands. Her eyes get watery, and she goes into her room.

All the while, Ava Gardner’s character (who had been Vick’s flame earlier in the movie) has been standing on the porch the whole time, and this little exchange between the man she loves and his new flame visibly effects her. But, believe me, if she hadn’t had emotional stakes in this wordless exchange, she would’ve been stepping out into that rain as a way of cooling herself off, just like the rest of us.

7. “The Point of No Return” in The Phantom of the Opera

Say what you will about this as an adaptation of the hit stage musical, but this is scene in smokin’! It’s a good thing they didn’t add more torches to that stage, because this song couldn’t handle any more heat.

In case you’ve never seen it, this musical number is toward the end of the movie. Christine (played by Emmy Rossum), her fiance Raoul (played by Patrick Wilson) and the opera managers are trying to capture the Phantom (played by Gerard Butler) by putting on a production of the Phantom’s opera Don Juan, Triumphant. Christine takes the role of the leading lady and becomes the bait, hoping to lure the Phantom out into the open so the nearby police can capture him during the performance. The Phantom kills the lead actor and takes over the role of Don Juan just in time for this number, which is about Don Juan trying to seduce Christine’s character.

In the POTO stage musical, neither Christine nor the in-universe audience initially realizes it’s the Phantom, because the actor wears a very large cloak that hides his figure and his face. (We in the real world realize it’s the Phantom, because we recognize his voice.) Here, though, the logic doesn’t work the same way, as Christine knows it’s the Phantom the whole time and actually tips off Raoul and the managers to get ready. And somehow that makes it more engaging, and you can see where Christine seemingly starts to fall under the Phantom’s proverbial spell and Raoul is visibly distressed by how Christine seems to be giving into the charade.

And while YouTube essayist Lindsay Ellis makes fun of the random tango dancers in the background, I appreciate it, because it helps give the scene more energy and movement. In the stage version, the Phantom and Christine move around a lot more. In the movie, they just walk toward each other, away from each other, and then up a flight of stairs, and then toward each other again. Not really all that dynamic. But, the tango dancers help with that, along with adding to the ambiance and the tension.

And, while many POTO purists bemoan Butler being cast as the Phantom — and while I agree with them in some respects — his voice has a good timbre, and he has more sex appeal than someone like Michael Crawford (who originated the role on Broadway). The weird (and admittedly unhealthy) dynamic between Butler’s Phantom and Rossum’s Christine is built up to a climax at this point in the movie, and the chemistry between them absolutely works. In the stage musical, this number comes off as more creepy, in part thanks to the giant cloak that the Phantom wears as Don Juan that makes him look like a fat Ghost of Christmas Future. It’s hard to see that as sexy. However, here, director Joel Schumacher — love him or hate him (and I’m definitely more in the ‘hate him’ camp) — allows the Phantom and Christine to have a more honest and open musical number, which helps turns up the sexiness and tone down the creepiness.

6. A song and shelter from the rain in Twelfth Night

I think what we’ve learned so far is that, if you’re making a movie and you want a really hot scene, throw in some dancing or rain, because the latter makes the list again thanks to the 1996 film adaptation of Shakespeare’s Twelfth Night.

After believing her brother to be dead and having been stranded in an enemy land — both of which are thanks to a shipwreck — Viola (played by Imogen Stubbs) decides to disguise herself as a man, and takes the name Cesario and becomes an assistant to Duke Orsino (played by Toby Stephens). Orsino, seeing that Cesario is a handsome youth, recruits him to ask Countess Olivia (played by Helena Bonham Carter) to marry Orsino. Cesario goes, and Olivia ends up falling for Cesario instead of Orsino. Around this point in the play, Orsino is trying to ask Cesario to return to Olivia’s mansion to plead Orsino’s case again, but Cesario — because she’s actually a woman and is in love with Orsino herself — doesn’t want to.

In this scene, Orsino and Cesario take refuge from a rainstorm in a barn, where they stumble across Olivia’s fool (played by Ben Kingsley), whom Orsino asks to play them a song. As the fool is singing, Orsino looks on at Cesario, who’s across the room and then walks over and puts his arm around Cesario’s shoulder. Cesario/Olivia looks a little uncomfortable at the idea of the man she loves putting his arm around her, but rolls with it. As he sings, the fool looks on, knowing exactly what’s going on between them. Orsino continues looking at Cesario, who is still unsure how to react and quickly keeps glancing over at him as well. Their faces move closer and closer to each other as the fool keeps singing; and, just as Cesario/Olivia and Orsino are about to kiss, the fool stops singing and awkwardly takes a swig of his drink in an “I didn’t see anything” sort of way.

The dialogue is from the original play, but the film takes creative liberties by changing the location, the dynamic between Cesario and Orsino, and the whole context of what’s happening. That’s the thing about adaptations! It really works here, because at the end of the play, when Cesario is revealed to be a woman, Orsino proposes to her. While their friendship had definitely been built up in the text, whether Orsino felt anything more for Cesario/Olivia beyond friend was never really addressed until after her identity is revealed. But, in this version, the film — and this scene in particular — shows us that Orsino had feelings for Cesario/Olivia beyond simple friendship, which he probably felt he had to repress for a multitude of reasons. And, of course, all that unresolved tension just works to make the scene blowtorch levels of hot!

Of course, all of these above entries are about as cold as a visit to the pool and an ice cream cone on a Sunday afternoon compared to these Top 5 melt-your-face-like-the-Ark-of-the-Covenant levels of heat!

5. The hand-touch scene in Star Wars: The Last Jedi

Oh, baby, you better believe that this scene made somebody swoon in the theater the first time they saw it. (Me. It was me. JK. I was close though.) And, again, we have an intimate conversation taking place as one of our poor lovestruck idiots is soaking wet and it’s pouring rain outside. Rian Johnson, girl, you know exactly what you’re doing!

For some of you reading this, you might be thinking: “What?! Rey and Kylo aren’t a ~thing~.” Kid, have I got several studio executives and actors’ comments, internet essays and fanposts for you to read. As I’ve said before, if you’re going to see The Rise of Skywalker, better be prepared for these fools to make out by the end!

I would like to point out — and I’m not the first to do so — that in The Force Awakens, Rey keeps telling Finn to let go of her hand. Yet, here, we see her willingly reach out to Kylo and allow him to touch hers.

And while basically the entirety of their scenes in The Last Jedi could be on this list — including the Praetorian guard fight and the ‘rule the galaxy with me’ proposal — I believe this scene is the culmination of Kylo/Ben and Rey’s relationship thus far, as it shows us the first instance they connected on a deeper level and saw the potential of their lives together. That’s why Rey is so willing to defend Kylo/Ben to Luke. That’s why Kylo is willing to kill Snoke — throwing away everything he’s ever known — to save Rey. Each of them so desperately wants the future they saw, but neither is willing to go over to the other’s side to get it. And, while their destinies seemed to have been intertwined since they met each other in TFA, here is where it goes from ‘intertwined’ to ‘inseparably bound together.’

And that’s only one part of why this scene is hotter than forest fire.

4. The dance scene in The Mask of Zorro

C’mon. You had to know this was coming, right? It is the lead art for this article, after all.

With this scene, everything is so palpable. The passion! The romance! You can feel the chemistry building between these two characters, even though they kinda-sorta just met. It’s enough to make you run into the backyard, turn on the hose, and spray yourself down.

Everything about this scene works — from the dance choreography and music to the costumes and performances. The pacing. The angles. There’s such energy to the scene that absolutely sucks you in, even though our couple doesn’t exchange a word until after the dance is over.

And, damn, if dance scenes aren’t like the easiest way to get some sexual tension and physical intimacy — but not too much — into your scene. If Antonio Banderas’ Alejandro/Zorro had been wearing his mask in this scene, we all would’ve swooned the first time we watched it. Thankfully, the screenwriter had pity on us and made sure this all took place when he’s in his ‘I’m a boring rich guy and totally not a vigilante’ persona.

3. The Laendler dance in The Sound of Music

Allow me to take a large gulp of cold water before I talk about this scene.

Yes, this scene. You all know exactly the one I’m talking about.

Maria is so innocently trying to teach the children how to do the dance, Captain Von Trapp steps in, and the two flawlessly go through the first minute or two of the dance… until… they’re so close together, basically in each other’s arms, and neither can take their eyes off the other. They stop. And, Maria’s all flustered, saying “I can’t remember the rest,” and visibly blushes, which others nearby point out to her. She makes an excuse: “I’m not used to dancing.”

Girl, you are not used to dancing with a guy as handsome as Captain Von Trapp, that’s what it is. You were in the convent like a week ago, and now the hottest guy on the block is doing the whole Held Gaze thing with you. How do you not plop down on your knee right there and propose to the man? (Oh, I guess, because it’s the early 20th century, and traditional gender roles are still very much a thing. Damn it!) And how did everyone present not go blind from overexposure to pure awesomeness?!

So, if you need to, I’d recommend you grab an ice pack now, because these next two entries are somehow even hotter than this one. (“Is that even possible, Corinne?” you ask. Yes. Yes, it is.)

2. The library scene in The Scarlet Pimpernel (1982)

In rewatching this scene — purely as research for writing this article, of course — my reaction was similar to the babbling great-grandma from Rapsittie Street Kids.

This scene is so hot that, I had to pause half-way through, call an Uber to take me to the airport, book a round-trip ticket to Norway, find a guide who could take me to the coldest frozen tundra in the far north of the country, and then camp out there for a few weeks — because, holy hell, this scene is HOT!!!

Where do I even begin? How about the fact that they’re both so deeply in love with the other, but because of ~drama~ they’ve come to believe that the other one doesn’t love them and/or is untrustworthy. Or maybe it’s also that it’s a culmination of a lot of the movie’s plots and subplots that have been building up to this point. Or maybe it’s because Marguerite (played by Jane Seymour) finally tells her husband that her family is in trouble and she needs help, even though she doesn’t realize it’s him? She won’t trust Percy (played by Anthony Andrews) as her husband, but she will trust him as the Scarlet Pimpernel. Or when Percy tells her that he’s only a phantom, and she’s all: “You’re so real. I can feel your warmth even now.” You two. are. married!!! It’s like the perfect blend of drama, melodrama and romance!

It’s absolutely hilarious that she’s in love with her husband, and also sort of in love with the Scarlet Pimpernel, and doesn’t realize they’re one and the same. I also think it would’ve been hilarious if someone had walked in on this super-dramatic moment. Marguerite thinks she’s finally meeting this mysterious hero but can’t turn around to see his face, and Percy’s all walking up behind her and whispering, and they’re having this very serious and emotionally charged conversation. And then some dolt walks in like, “Oh, it’s the Blakeneys! What on earth are you kids up to?”

But then again, if someone had, it would’ve ruined not only the story but this scene. It’s bad enough that the clock chimes midnight in this ‘the fairy tale is over, Cinderella’ sort of way, and the two have to skedaddle out of the room separately in the hopes that neither will be found out.

Even so, the scene’s conclusion only adds to the tension, because while Percy has learned about Marguerite’s drama, Marguerite has yet to discover that Percy is the Scarlet Pimpernel, which is also a great scene, by the way. But, nothing beats this one.

Holy hell. Excuse me while I find the nearest icy lake, cut a hole in it and jump in before I talk about the No. 1 Hottest Scenes in Cinema*:

1. “Shall We Dance?” in The King & I

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No, that’s not a typo. That’s me, having a bout of heat stroke while rewatching this scene. But, fortunately, I know how to combat it: thinking about all the historical inaccuracies and probably racist / colonialist undertones of this telling of Anna Leonowens and the King of Siam.

Still, all those other entries feel so lukewarm compared to this, which is the cinematic equivalent of the surface of the sun in terms of hotness. And, as the comments on the official YouTube clip demonstrate, I’m not the only one who feels like I should’ve been covering my eyes during this scene, even though they’re both fully clothed.

I don’t know if you’re familiar with the term ‘eye sex,’ but that’s basically what’s going on here. We’ve seen it in some of these other entries, but this scene takes the cake!

I don’t want to dilute the absolute raw magnetism of these performers and the scene as a whole, but I do want to point out that — in addition to what happens in the musical number itself — perhaps one reason why it stands out in our minds is because this is the closest these two people were throughout the entire film. SPOILERS for The King & I, but these two don’t end up together. In fact, this scene is the last time they’re both happy and together. Shortly after this, ~drama~ occurs, and the movie ends with the king’s death. This is the one time they actually got to be a couple, and do ‘couple things’ like dance together. They spent most of their time bickering and arguing and trying to subtly one-up each other. There are a few moments of genuine chemistry and kindness, don’t get me wrong, and this is one of them.

Looking back over this list, only four of these couples are ‘together’ and living happily ever after by the end of their respective movies. (I’m not counting Rey and Kylo/Ben, because even if I think they could end up together in TROS, they aren’t together at the end of TLJ.) There’s a variety of reasons, but it mostly boils down to ‘one of them dies’ or ‘one of them was already in a relationship with someone else.’ Here, it’s the former, and again, perhaps one reason this scene is so iconic — in addition to the music, costumes, choreography, and performances — is because we see what they could’ve been together if ~drama~ hadn’t happened. But, then again, they really could never have been together to begin with, because of how different their cultures and expectations were. And, isn’t the whole idea of couple who loves each other passionately but can never be together one of the hottest tropes there is?

Still, at least we got one scene where they were not only happy and working in tandem, but one that must’ve scorched the film reel whenever they recorded it because this scene IS SO FUCKING HOT!!!!! GAHHAHAH!

*dies from internal combustion*

FADE TO BLACK.

THE END.