I will be the first to admit that I enjoy watching my favorite shows and movie franchises partly because I want to see certain characters get together romantically. One of the things that keeps me excited to watch my programs is for those little moments between these characters – holding hands, meaningful glances, words of affection and care. While I know it doesn’t drive everybody to watch any or all of their favorite shows or movie franchises, I know it’s the driving force behind much of it on the internet, particularly certain social media platforms.
I know that all of this harkens back to age-old storytelling tropes: love triangles, unrequited love, etc., all of which have been around since fucking mythology. And it’s not changing any time soon. And, that’s fine.
But I also think it’s important that, in the midst of all these ‘shipping’ wars, we don’t lose sight of what often holds – or at least what SHOULD hold – movie franchises and TV shows together: friendships and positive (or sometimes negative) platonic interactions between characters.
I know there are a lot of shows that do this, and do it well. No doubt.
But, I want to draw your attention to 30 Rock, one of my all-time favorite shows.
There are a lot of interesting and great and completely platonic relationships between the male and female characters on the show: Liz and Pete. Liz and Frank. Liz and Kenneth. You will notice I’m not including Jenna much on this list because, aside from Pete, she has sex with most of her other male coworkers at one point or other in the show, including Jack, Kenneth and Frank. And, while she doesn’t develop any long-term romantic relationships with any of them and is able to have crucial friendships with all of them (especially Kenneth), I wanted all my examples to be completely platonic.
But, if you will indulge me, let’s take a deeper dive into the three male-female friendships that were the heart of this show:
(I’m going to go backwards in terms of screen time and importance)
1. TRACY AND JENNA
This is a dynamic that ultimately works, even though it really shouldn’t on a practical level. Both of these characters are complete narcissists – selfish, self-absorbed, and unintelligent to a degree. Tracy is a buffoon, and Jenna is a diva.
But the biggest drawback to their dynamic – their egos – is also their starting point and the reason it kinda works, for the most part.
Tracy and Jenna bond over their shared experiences of the pressures of stardom and fame. They bond over their shared dealings with Liz, Jack, and Pete. And, despite Jenna being kind of a sex freak, she and Tracy never get together, and to my recollection, neither ever makes the moves on the other.
They collaborate on various projects – Jenna’s song that gets parodied by Weird Al; Tracy’s Broadway performance for his EGOT; Jenna trying to get back with her ex-boyfriend Paul after her ‘sexual walkabout’ fails; and when they help Liz “problem-solve” her Deal Breakers talk show with Jack, among others.
Yet, they fight a lot too, giving the show plenty of drama and conflict to overcome in any given episode; but this also gives the show a sense of realism among its friendship dynamics.
Jenna is upset at Tracy for intruding on her show, and she never really gets over it. Tracy is mad at Jenna for various things – but later on in the series, it’s because Jenna starts gaining fame and notoriety after she becomes a judge on America’s Kidz Got Singing.
(You will see that all these friendships have their high and low points: they get along; they support each other; but they also fight, and when they do, they know each other’s weak points to attack. Because that’s what friends do in real life: sometimes they disagree, and when they do it’s ugly. But when they’re going strong, it’s like the best thing ever.)
Still, after being on television together almost every week for seven years, these two have become understandably close. It’s to the point where (SPOILERS), in the finale, they share a tearful hug, and Jenna says, genuinely, that she’s going to miss working with him. He tells her that he’s going out to get cigarettes, and he’ll be back in 15 minutes. (This is a reference to earlier in the episode, where he said he’s in denial about the show ending, and admits that he doesn’t know how to or want to say goodbye to his castmates and friends.)
This dynamic, while childish and frustrating at times, flourishes because, while these are two people who oftentimes can’t stand each other, Tracy and Jenna ultimately understand what the other is going through better than anyone else on the show.
2. TRACY AND LIZ
This was sort of the kick-off for the whole series. Tracy Jordan is asked to come on The Girlie Show, and essentially save it. Over the course of the series, Tracy proved to Liz that while he was a good person and cared deeply about his family and friends, he was extremely difficult to work with. He rarely, if ever, took orders. He was selfish, had a huge ego, and serious issues to work through in his personal and professional life.
And while Liz supported Tracy through his ordeals more than he supported her, whenever he did offer advice, words of encouragement or assistance, it was always genuine, heartfelt, and second nature for him to do so.
For her part, while Tracy mostly made her professional and sometimes personal life absolute hell, he (and Jenna) ultimately prepared her for anything. (SPOILERS: In the series’ penultimate episode, she adopts two kids exactly like her two ‘work kids.’)
And even though Tracy has an ego, his star power saved her show.
Later in the series, Tracy finds out just how hard Liz Lemon has to work to get him to do his job everyday. And while he doesn’t show his appreciation outwardly, it’s clear he’s grown to respect her even more.
In one episode, Tracy’s wife demands that he have an affair (to save his image), and he “tries” to “seduce” Liz. It is unsuccessful, for many reasons, but in the conversation that follows, we really start to see why this dynamic works so well, even when they don’t work well together.
Liz admits that she’s jealous of Tracy for having a well-put-together personal life: he has a wife he’s totally devoted to, and kids who see him as their hero. And, even still, as the series progresses so does Tracy’s career (to a degree). Yet he stays on their show.
Even though he has no qualm about making Liz’s day-to-day life hellish, when the chips are down, he does listen to her, follows her advice and obeys her directions.
Each of them has a great respect for the other; it’s just that Tracy is so childish and Liz is so bossy that neither of them expresses or demonstrates it all that often, except in very rare but poignant moments.
3. JACK AND LIZ
Unlike the other two on this list, this one arguably could have been a romantic pairing. Throughout the series, there are several “shippy” moments between these two, starting in the first season, where – after Jack asks her to be his ‘date’ to a black-tie event – she thinks Jack is going to make a move on her. In reality, though, he just wanted back the necklace that he’d lent her, and then he makes it VERY clear that he never intended that, insulting her in the process.
Jack’s mother Colleen thinks that Liz would be a perfect match for him, romantically, because she has “strength of character.” There’s the scene where Jack pretends that Liz is his lover, and they act out a soap-opera-esque scene to trick Kathy Geiss in Season 3. Liz has a dream where she’s giving birth to Jack’s baby (weirdly, of course, it’s Meat Cat, a parody of the animated Cheeto’s Mascot) in Season 4. Jack pretends to be in love with Liz in Season 4, but only so her guy-pal Danny will stop paying attention to Liz and start hanging out more with him. They get married (by accident) in Season 5. Avery gets jealous of Jack and Liz’s “special” relationship, after he tells Liz about his and Avery’s possible names for their kid, and listens to her “advice.” There’s the “kiss” between them in Season 6. They share a bed (but nothing else happens) in Season 7, where Liz even asks out loud why nothing ever DID happen between them. And (SPOILERS) one of the last moments in the finale is them saying that they love each other, although Jack makes it very clear that it’s in the platonic sense.
But, these moments all do a great job of subverting this “will they, won’t they” trope. Hell, even Jeffrey Weinerslav (the HR/hiring guy) says whenever they were “married” that they’ve always given off that vibe, and “It’s been interesting to watch your courtship.”
I think the ultimate reason why is: that’s not who they are. That’s not who they want to be to each other. Jack isn’t attracted to Liz like that, and Liz was always Jack’s subordinate who disagreed with him on several things – politics, life choices, gender roles/expectations, age gap, etc.
But, that didn’t mean that their relationship wasn’t important.
After all, Liz was Jack’s emergency contact as early as Season 1. He oftentimes trusted and relied on her when he wouldn’t trust or rely on anyone else. Despite proclaiming that he had all these powerful, wealthy, and famous friends throughout the series, ultimately, in Season 7, we find out that Liz is the only true friend that Jack really has.
Despite being boss/employee and mentor/mentee, Jack isn’t afraid to let Liz fail. He’s comfortable going out of his way to help her in a way he wouldn’t with many of his other employees (probably because she’s his mentee/friend, which, fair enough.)
In the episode “Problem Solvers,” when Liz pushes Jack away in an effort to protect herself and explore her professional options, Jack is legitimately offended, and acts likewise with her. He even has a revelation that he “wants to do business” with Liz, rather than anyone else – wanting to change and improve her life, instead of, say, Padma Lakshmi’s. He puts his personal interests over the bottom line, and – as ‘Future Jack’ tells him in a hallucination – that’s ultimately how he becomes happy in life. He used to be a shark, and Liz Lemon “un-shark-ulated” him. But, caring about her (and others) is what makes him a better and happier person, as ‘Future Jack’ demonstrates.
And, as he tells Avery, she’s the perfect mentee because she has the Drive, Intelligence, Chaos and Humility (or DICH) in her life to require and accept his mentorship.
And, for her part, Liz is comfortable with Jack in a way she isn’t with most people. She tells him everything – her weird foot problems, her relationship troubles, her very awkward and embarrassing secrets – to the point where Jack is “in her head,” and she can predict how he would react and what kind of advice he would give even in hypothetical situations. She goes out of her way to make Jack feel like a part of her family, and a part of her life, as she invites him to go with her to class reunions and meeting up with her family.
We see over and over that Liz is willing to demean and embarrass herself for Jack’s benefit – taking off her shirt and dancing around as a distraction when he embarrasses himself in front of his colleagues… pretending to be pregnant to keep suspicion off Jack’s wife Avery, who really IS pregnant… calling in bomb threats so his high school crush will stay in town an extra day. And, these are just a handful of examples.
For someone that Jack looks down on for being a woman, a writer or ‘creative type’, a less-than-model-attractive person, and a relatively unambitious un-shark-like person… Liz comes through for Jack more often than most people do. And, Jack looks out for her, too. He even loses a deal against himself in Season 6, purposely making a mistake in negotiations over Liz’s contract, because he wants to “take care of her.”
This relationship is the heart of the show, as is clear from both the pilot and the finale. Jack walks in and seemingly ruins Liz’s life. He fires her friend Pete; he forces her to hire Tracy; and he expects much more of her than she believes is right. But, over time they become more than employer/employee… they become the best of friends, to the point where their friendship is the most meaningful one in either of their lives.
In the penultimate episode, “Hogcock!”, Jack and Liz – both in professional and personal spirals – argue. Liz asks Jack for help finding a new job; Jack says he really can’t, and he won’t, because he’s realized that work will never make either of them really happy. Liz questions what their entire relationship has been about for the last seven years, saying, “I guess you and I were just a boss and his employee.” And Jack agrees.
This argument sends both of them further down their spirals, as Jack tries to reconcile, as he doesn’t really have anything else he can count on in his life. And, Liz acts in her typical Lemon-esque behavior and refuses.
In the finale (SPOILERS), Jack’s faux-suicidal behavior forces Liz to overcome her trademark stubbornness and grudge-holding to accept and admit that Jack is someone special whose friendship she doesn’t want to lose, regardless of what happens to them in life.
Again, this is all stuff that is typical of romantic couples on TV. But, over and over again, 30 Rock subverts these tropes, leading to one of the most poignant and, dare I say, realistic relationships on the show.
This is one of the reasons I really admire this show: the fact that it had a man and a woman, against all odds, remaining platonic friends, regardless of all the chaos and changes in their lives.
On TV, it has become commonplace for even workplace acquaintances to hook-up, to the point where everyone is basically ‘Eskimo brothers’ and ‘sisters’ with each other. (See Grey’s Anatomy as an example.)
And, while yes, this happens on 30 Rock to some extent, the three main male-female friendships remain ever-sacred in that regard. Jenna sleeps around with many of her male coworkers, but she never makes the moves on Tracy (to my recollection). Jack and Liz are continually implied (by both the audience and in-show characters) to be something more than what they are, but they never become a ‘couple’ in that sense.
And, that’s fine.
It’s perfectly normal, and, dare I say, healthy for people to work together, share office space, daily stress, yearly challenges, and be a major part of each other’s professional and sometimes personal lives without them ever hooking up, or even considering it.
The fact that Liz and Jack remain platonic throughout seven seasons, and admit, meaningfully, that they love each other in the finale is a huge thing.
I think it promotes a healthy dynamic among straight men and women: it is perfectly normal, healthy, and even ideal for you to have strong friendships with people of the opposite sex.
(For LGBTQ+ folks, this would be people of any sex/gender you’re attracted to. It is possible and healthy for us all to have strong friendships with people, regardless of sexual orientation, gender identity, etc.)
IN CONCLUSION
In a culture of ‘shipping’ and possible ‘over-sexualization’ of things in our media, it’s become commonplace for us to see a young, handsome, straight guy and want him to end up with the young, beautiful, straight gal, especially if they’re our lead protagonists. And, there’s nothing wrong with that.
But, I wish more shows would imitate 30 Rock, in that it revolved around a group of friends, who rarely if ever, consider each other in a romantic or sexual way. Yes, they might break that rule on occasion; yes, they might make jokes about it; but ultimately, their friendships are the driving force of the show (both for the audience and in-universe). Friendships between people of different races, personalities, ambitions, socioeconomic backgrounds, upbringings, professions; friendships between employers and employees; friendships between men and women.
People can watch their modern-day soap operas disguised as superhero shows or medical procedurals or crime dramas.
That’s totally fine. I watch them too, and I enjoy it.
But, I more so enjoy and appreciate those shows that can stand on their own, without relying on “will they, won’t they” dynamics, love triangles, and unrequited love. Shows about friendships and platonic love.
Shows like 30 Rock.