Month: April 2023

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Rod Stewart: Year by Year, Track by Track Part 8 1985-1988

Part 8: In Which Our Hero Continues His Chart Topping Ways By Staying Forever Young

Rod Stewart had continued to have hits as the 1980’s marched towards the halfway point. Stewart however would start slowing down his musical output. From 1970-1984, Stewart had released 16 albums between his solo efforts and his time with The Faces.

Stewart however, would start focusing more on the quality of his output again. Both Body Wishes and Camouflage had their moments, but did not quite live up to the lofty standards that Stewart had set for himself.

Before Our Hero released his next studio album, he lent his vocals to his old mate, Jeff Beck.

Flash July 1985 Jeff Beck Album

274. People Get Ready (Curtis Mayfield)

Jeff Beck was known to be hard to work with. He would only release an album every couple of years, but when he did, they usually were pretty solid. Stewart and Beck teamed up the year prior for a couple of songs off of Stewart’s Camouflage album. Stewart returns the favor by turning up on Beck’s album Flash.

The dynamic duo pair up for a stirring rendition of what Martin Luther King Jr. named the unofficial anthem of the Civil Rights Movement. No one can touch The Impressions original recording, but if you are going to try, it better be two of the greatest performers of all time.

Stewart slays on the vocals and Beck is up to the challenge on the guitar. Beck’s version is a little more rough but it needs to be. It gives the song a whole new life.

Grade: A+

Rod entered the studio again 1985. After his successful album, Camouflage, Stewart had confidence of working with his new manager Arnold Stiefel for a couple of years and seemed focused on delivering a more thoughtful and substantial album. And while reviews in Rolling Stone were brutal, with hip if there was the internet at the time, click-baity sentences like, “but it’s encouraging to see signs of life from this likable dinosaur (for the record, Rod Stewart was 41 when Every Beat of My Heart dropped, my age. Far from a dinosaur. I wonder if these “music critics” are eating crow, here we are nearly 40 years later and he is still relevant and releasing new music.)

Every Beat of My Heart June 23, 1986

275. Here to Eternity (Rod Stewart, Kevin Savigar)

Crime and punishment is the subject that Our Hero has explored several times in the past. Most effectively on Scarred and Scared, on Here to Eternity Stewart takes the role of a woman who’s husband has been arrested on a robbery he did not commit. The law and the court doesn’t listen to her and the song is a plead to the justice system and to “Jimmy Doyle”.

Rod sings the hell out of the song, with a show stopping, sing along chorus;

“But I love him, Here to Eternity, Forever, unto Eternity, Oh God gave me something I must hold onto, Gonna hold onto him, no matter what you do, cause I love him to eternity.”

Rod ends the song with the sentencing of Jimmy to death. With some haunting, beautiful lyrics, “But Amanda with her long red hair made one last plea, As the court fell into silence, she cried out desperately!”

Grade: A

276. Another Heartache (Rod Stewart, Bryan Adams, Jim Vallance, Randy Wayne)

“Believe me darlin’ this ain’t no game, if you think I’ll be your fool you better think again, I know you love me, but it just ain’t right, I’m sick and tired of fighting with you every night.”

I love this song. Stewart is in top vocal form. He destroys Another Heartache with raw emotion and singing prowess. Stewart had glimmers of greatness on his previous two albums, but on Every Beat of My Heart, Stewart is firing on all cylinders. Gone is most of the studio embellishments that found their way on his early 80’s albums. Back is Stewart in full vocal force. And he flexes his muscles on this winning track. The video is also first rate. Here to Eternity signaled the return of reflective Rod, Another Heartache signaled the return of the best singer in rock ‘n’ roll.

Grade: A+

There is an extended version of Another Heartache on the digital extended version of “Every Beat of My Heart”. More of a remix, that peculiarly adds “I love you honey” from Hot Legs.The music mix is different, some added lyrics but essentially the same song. Not sure if it adds anything to the song but it is fun.

277. A Night Like This (Rod Stewart)

In more ways than one, the album Every Beat of My Heart is a return to a more familiar Rod Stewart. While Stewart will never recapture the magic and looseness of his early albums, it was refreshing to hear him truly go back to his rock roots.

A Night Like This is about the deflowering of a young man, with a more experienced woman. Not as self deprecating and vindictive as Maggie May but it still contains trademark humor from Our Hero. “I’m a set designer, my mum and dad thinking I’m gay.” Driving beat propels the song and Stewart is again in top vocal form.

Grade: B

278. Who’s Gonna Take Me Home (The Rise and Fall of a Budding Gigolo) (Rod Stewart, Kevin Savigar, Jay Davis)

“Well, I arrived on time, in my corduroy suit and me bottle of wine.” Rod is great at writing songs about making an ass of himself at parties (see Had Me a Real Good Time). I think it might be the greatest song title ever too.

The song is silly but funny and Stewart crushes it vocally. Is it Rod’s deepest song? No. Is it fun and I never skip it when it pops up? Hell yes!

I love the final verse, “I woke up, on the floor, still in my suit she told me I snored, I never felt so cheap, I had a good laugh at the size of her feet.”

Grade: B+

279. Red Hot in Black (Rod Stewart, Jim Cregan, Kevin Savigar)

Rod tries to tame a beautiful, black-haired(!) woman in Paris. His exploits of trying to get her into bed, and Stewart’s trademark humor keeps this blistering song going.

I love the lyrics, “Hey boys! Mystery, Didn’t even know her name, one night in Paris with a girl like that, never going home again.”

The breakneck pace adds to the fun of the track.

Grade: B+

There is an alternate mix of Red Hot in Black on the digital extended version of “Every Beat of My Black.” It’s more aggressive and brings Rod’s voice forward slightly more. Same lyrics, but drops some of the background embellishments.

280. Love Touch (Mike Chapman, Gene Black, Holly Knight)

This is a weird one. Rod sings the hell out of this song on the other hand, it is really dumb. The chorus is “I wanna give you my love touch, ooh, ooh, ooh.”

Rod stated in Storyteller “This is one of the silliest songs I’ve ever recorded. Although, hugely successful, I can’t bring myself to sing it in concert. Holly Knight has written many a good song, but this is not one of them.”

I don’t think it’s quite as bad as Stewart says, it isn’t great but it still went to number 6 on the Billboard Charts and was the theme for the popular Robert Redford movie, Legal Eagles.

Grade: C

If you can’t get enough of Love Touch, there is an extended version on the digital version of “Every Beat of My Heart”. The music plays out a little longer, the middle bridge is slightly different with a different vocal take.

281. In My Own Crazy Way (Rod Stewart, Frankie Miller, Troy Seals, Eddie Setser)

I freaking love this song. Rod gets help from Frankie Miller on a tender, slow moving song with incredible lyrics.

“I tried to keep my sanity, by being some else, someone that you, could hold onto, I only fooled myself.” Our Hero brings it home in the final verse, “the memories of you and me, are written on the wind, and sometimes girl, I’d give the world to do it all again.” The chorus is heart wrenching, “I will always love you, in my own crazy way.”

Grade: A+

A stripped down version of In My Own Crazy Way appears on the digital extended version of “Every Beat of My Heart”. More restrained and it looses the back up singers, just Rod and minimal music, great stuff.

282. Every Beat of My Heart (Rod Stewart, Kevin Savigar)

A stirring, loving song about missing home. Deeply personal to Stewart as he conjures visions of England and Scotland.

Rod once again is giving it all in an emotional 5 minute tour de force. Stewart is a master at making choruses being heartfelt and arena ready singalongs. “Seagull carry me, over land and sea, to my own folk that’s where I want to be, every beat of my heart, tears me further apart, I’m lost and alone in the dark, I’m going home!”

Grade: A+

283. Ten Days of Rain (Rod Stewart, Kevin Savigar, Tony Brock)

A ballad that is so heartbreakingly devastating that it should be a hit. Rod again is in the right headspace lyrically and vocally. Breaking up and missing the woman you love is the subject of Ten Days of Rain. Getting over someone you love is hard, and it feels like it’s raining figuratively and literally.

Here’s my favorite lyrics “I can hear the freight train whistle, I can hear the church bell toll, but her telephone line when it’s off the hook, that’s the loneliest sound of them all, in letter that she wrote me, before she went away, she said “darling love is not a hard word to say.”

Grade: A

284. In My Life (John Lennon, Paul McCartney)

Strip a stone cold classic Beatles song, and sing it A Capella style with few music accompaniments, and you have a song that is, sorry to say better than The Beatles. By changing the tempo and vocally giving it a different emotion, you make it your own that is a brilliant way to close the album.

Grade: A+

To hear Stewart at his absolute best, listen to the piano version of In My Life. It can be found on the box set, The Rod Stewart Sessions.

Although Stewart scored a top 10 hit with Love Touch, and despite the album Every Beat of My Heart, being a really good album, it stalled at number 28 on the Billboard Charts. The album fared better in the UK, it reached number 5. One of the issues with the album is possibly the cover. It is a fun cover, with Our Hero underneath a train car, but it only has Rod Stewart above him. No album title and in America it was released under the title, “Rod Stewart”. The album would plant the seeds however of one of Rod’s best albums in 1988. But before we get there, we need to make a couple of stops along the way.

The single, Love Touch was a massive hit for Stewart. Stewart however did not like the song and despite its success, he rarely promoted it. On the B-side of the Love Touch 12” single contained a song intended for the album but didn’t make the cut.

285. Hard Lesson to Learn (Peter Blachley, Bernie Taupin, James Triplett)

A slow, beautiful song about loving someone who doesn’t love you back. My first response when I heard Hard Lesson to Learn was, “how did this not end up on the record?” But the more I thought about it, the song doesn’t really fit the overall experience of Every Beat of My Heart.

But Stewart sings his heart out and takes us along for the ride. It is a really good song that is now available digitally and needs to be heard.

Grade: A-

There is a stripped down version of Hard Lesson to Learn on The Rod Stewart Sessions. Just Rod and a piano. Although this version loses some of the power of the released version, it does once again prove Rod is one hell of a singer.

Before we leave 1986, The Rod Stewart Sessions released in 2009 gave us one more unreleased gem.

286. Heaven (Rod Stewart)

Not quite a finished, 8 minute long song was lost until 2009. Heaven is structurally a little different than what we accustomed to hearing from Rod. The themes are there, love that is so special that it’s like “heaven”.

The song rambles a bit, but it is almost a great idea. Stewart is trying to work out the lyrics, that are not quite finished and he is leading the band through the song. Calling out “next verse” and “guitar”. The song needs a little more oomph, but the idea is almost there. It doesn’t feel 8 minutes long which is a testament to the almost finished quality.

Grade: B-

Rod almost took 1987 off. But Hollywood called him again. With the success of Love Touch, Stewart was pegged to sing a song for the great sci-fi comedy, Innerspace. Rod would take one of his most beloved songs and update it.

Innerspace July 1987

287. Twistin’ The Night Away (Sam Cooke)

Rod would tackle a song that he previously recorded in 1972 for the album, Never A Dull Moment. I personally think this version is Rod’s definitive version. He has more confidence, sings it better and it has a driving force that is infectious. Stewart got the vibe of the film perfectly with this cover.

Where Love Touch embarrassed him, he should be damn proud of his updated Twistin’ The Night Away. The video is one of Rod’s best as well. Seeing him and Martin Short dance together is nothing short (wink) of genius.

Grade: A+

Stewart had embraced the early 80’s with new-wave and synth pop. With 1986’s Every Beat of My Heart he made a more substantial album and he took that confidence with him into the studio with the release of his 1988 masterpiece, Out of Order.

Out of Order May 23, 1988

288. Lost in You (Rod Stewart, Andy Taylor)

What a way to open an album. With the pulsating beats immediately giving you a feeling that you are in for a rocking good time. And by the time Stewart steps up to the mic and shouts, “Hey Baby!” you are sucked into one of Stewart’s most confident and best records.

The happiness is infectious, the second verse always gets me, “Hey baby! You don’t know what you’ve done for me, I’m so happy as any man can deserve to be, I was living in a life of sin, God knows what a mess I was in, So glad you find me I ain’t gettin’ any younger.”

The video is awesome, the song is awesome.

Grade: A+

On Tonight’s The Night: Live 1976-1998 there is an incredible live performance of Lost In You. What makes this version special is it adds a fourth verse that Rod would only sing live.

289. The Wild Horse (Rod Stewart, Andy Taylor)

“I ran way with a hobo and his gypsy friends” so proclaims Our Hero as he leaves his life behind for a life as a troubadour.

Rod is killing it as he rips through verse after verse landing on the chorus, “Cause a wild horse runs free, forever!”

A hidden gem that needs to be blasted and you will be singing along in no time.

Grade: A+

290. Lethal Dose of Love (Rod Stewart, Andy Taylor, Tony Brock)

Randy Rod makes a return after a song about missing your love and the love of the road. It is another crunching rock ‘n’ roll song that has some killer grooves and guitar hooks.

“Whoa, whoa dance pretty sister, you turn me on, you make my blood run hot!” I truly enjoy this song, and I am aware that they’re a lot in the Stewart community that do not car for it. But I can’t get over the beat and killer lyrics, “Oh, my family was shocked by your antics and views, the color of your lips and hair, even my brother who’s a God fearin’ man, poor boy had to sit and stare.”

Rod totally crushes this song.

Grade: B+

291. Forever Young (Rod Stewart, Jim Cregan, Kevin Savigar, Bob Dylan)

An anthem for children and their parents. One of Rod’s best songs and sung with so much power and so much emotion. Forever Young is the one song that most people that don’t listen to Rod Stewart, know and love. A love letter to his kids with some of his best lyrics.

“May good fortune be with you, may your guiding light be strong, build a stairway to heaven with a prince or a vagabond.” Chills.

Rod brings it home with an emotional and powerful final verse;

“And when you finally fly away, I’ll be hoping that I served you well, For all the wisdom of a lifetime, No one can ever tell.”

After the song was released Stewart realized that it was close lyrically to Bob Dylan’s Forever Young. He sent the song to Dylan asking if he had any objections to the song. Dylan and Stewart agreed to give Dylan a song writing credit and a share of the royalties. I sort of disagree but hats off to Rod. Yes, some of the lyrics are similar, but Rod’s version is so much meatier and powerful.

Grade: A+

There is a piano version of Forever Young on The Rod Stewart Sessions. Rod mentioned that he tried many different arrangements and tempos with the song. In his autobiography Rod got advice from a surprising source, Rod states “I almost dumped the song before it could get to the album. We were going through the tracks and discussing overdubs, and we got to “Forever Young” and I said, “I’m not happy with this song. Let’s bin it.” A bit like “Maggie May”, I wasn’t sure that it had a strong enough hook. And suddenly an engineer, a guy called Steve MacMillan, who had worked in dutiful silence throughout the entire project and never had an opinion on anything, ever, piped up and said “I wouldn’t get rid of that if I were you. It’s the best song you got.”

292. My Heart Can’t Tell You No (Simon Climie, Dennis Morgan)

Rod slows things down with a song about a woman who cheats on him and the pain that he endures. “I don’t want you to come around here no more, I beg you for mercy.” And although he stated those facts he follows that up with, “so I let you in, knowing tomorrow I’m gonna wake up missing you.”

Rod is in top form yet again. He’s voice quakes with emotion and heartbreak and lost on what he’s going to do. Although he did not write My Heart Can’t Tell You No, it is his song.

Grade: A+

There is a more haunting version of My Heart Can’t Tell You No on The Rod Stewart Sessions. Rod is delivering some of his finest phrasing and emotion in the alternate version. The lyrics are mostly the same but the string accompaniment breathes new life into the song.

293. Dynamite (Rod Stewart, Andy Taylor)

Yes! A rip roaring, boys on the town rock song. Another song that I can’t believe was not a hit. Fast guitars and fast women pepper the song.

I love the fighting guitars, in the same vein as Hot Legs. Rod sings fast and loose. After listening to Dynamite, you just want to tear it up. The chorus is a sing along anthem for you and your boys;

“It’s dynamite, on Friday nights, under the big city lights, It’s all right, all right!”

Grade: A

294. Nobody Knows You When You’re Down and Out (Jimmy Cox)

An old blues song, first performed by Bessie Smith in 1929, Rod gives it some roughness. My guess is Rod heard Sam Cooke sing it and got the idea to record it from him. It appears on Sam’s incredible live album Live at the Copa.

It is serviceable and fun.

Grade: B

295. Crazy About Her (Rod Stewart, Duane Hutchings, Jim Cregan)

Hell yes. This is a doozy of a song. The sax, the drums, the bass, the guitars, Rod kinda rapping! Everything works in this song for me. It’s a little dark, a lot sexy and 100% awesome.

Rod has lyrics dripping with double meaning and sexiness “I see her everyday, in rush hour or subway, she don’t notice me, I might as well be a cockroach on the floor, if she belonged to me, I’d give her everything, I’d never cheat or lie, I’d treat her with respect, not just a sex object, I ain’t that kinda guy”

Grade: A+

There are many remixes of Crazy About Her. To seek out three of them, download the extended version found on digital platforms.

296. Try A Little Tenderness (Jimmy Campbell, Reginald Connelly, Harry M. Woods)

An old song reworked and made popular by Otis Redding in 1966, Rod oozes confidence as he absolutely owns Try A Little Tenderness.

As I think of songs that I think of when someone asks me, “which song do you think Rod Stewart sings the best on?” This song is always on my mind when I think of Stewart as an incredible vocalist. His phrasing, his emotion are all on full display. Not to mention the power in his voice. When I hear this song, I get goosbumps.

Grade: A+

To hear an absolute barn burner of a performance of this seek out the live performance on Tonight’s The Night: Live 1976-1998.

297. When I Was Your Man (Rod Stewart, Kevin Savigar)

Rod slows things down as he reminisces about being in love with a woman. Looking back on his love and how they could never work out Stewart proclaims “when I was your man, everything in my world seemed good and right.”

Our Hero once again is in top vocal form, but compared to the rest of the album it is almost a little too sweet. It is a solid song, but somewhat forgettable.

Grade: B

298. Almost Illegal (Rod Stewart, Andy Taylor)

After taking it slow for the last two songs, Out of Order cranks it up to close the album out. The story of young love, between a boy and a “farmer’s daughter.” Almost Illegal is so good. Here is the song on the album that should’ve been a hit, should’ve been released as a single but for some reason just glossed over.

The chorus is catchy as hell, “She’s fabulous, so sensuous, she’s marvelous, she’s mine, I’m delirious, it’s serious kinda dangerous, almost illegal!”

I love this song lyrically too because it tells a whole story, the final verse is brilliant;

“We had a one child by the springtime, another on the way, I got a new life and a good wife, ain’t that amazing grace.”

Grade: A+

Out of Order proved to be a massive hit for Stewart. While it only rose to number 20 on the Billboard Charts, it stayed there for over a year. In fact on the year end charts for 1988 it was number 53, but for 1989 it shot up to number 24. It surpassed over 2 million units sold in the United States. And all four singles, Lost In You, Forever Young, My Heart Can’t Tell You No and Crazy About Her were top 15 hits. Before we leave 1988, there are a few more Rod Stewart gems to listen to.

299. Days of Rage (Rod Stewart, Andy Taylor)

A hard driving rock song that was the B-side to Forever Young. A fun song, sung with conviction by Rod. The only reason I can think of why this did not end up on the album is they choose the better, Almost Illegal. Both songs have the same driving beat, with Almost Illegal, in my opinion being more strong structurally and lyrically stronger.

Days of Rage though is a blistering song that has Stewart recounting his life and how he got to where he is today (in 1988). Listen to at maximum volume!

Grade: B+

300. Love is a Four Letter Word (Rod Stewart)

“I’ve been sittin’ here all day trying to figure what I am gonna say…” Stewart pleads with his listener that he is still “in love with you”. A work in progress that Stewart would repurpose the lyrics, as some appear in Lost In You and others would pop up three years later on Vagabond Heart’s No Holding Back.

Although it is not finished, it still has some killer vocals from Stewart. It is also cool to hear Stewart hit on lyrics that he likes and brings back into finished songs.

In the liner notes for The Rod Stewart Sessions, Andy Zax states that Love is a Four Letter Word has been dancing around in Stewart’s head since Every Beat of My Heart.

Grade: B

301. I Go To Jail For You (Rod Stewart, Andy Taylor)

Another song that is not finished with Rod mumbling words to make them fit the music. The chorus and the swelling of the music leading into the chorus are all on point. But the rest of the song isn’t there. I think if Stewart wanted to, he could’ve spent maybe a little more time on this and it would’ve easily made the album. But Out of Order is already so strong that it doesn’t need any extra songs.

Grade: C

There was no stopping Rod Stewart. He conquered the 70’s and he was closing out the 80’s the same way. At the end of the decade Stewart was ready to tackle the 90’s on top of the music world. We will dive into that next in Part 9: In Which Our Hero Reunites with His Best Mate and Once Again Conquers MTV.

Articles, Top Lists

Ryan’s 150 Favorite Films: Number 114, Hot Shots! (1991)

One of the most frequent questions I am always asked being the host of the greatest movie podcast ever (opinions may vary) is “What’s your favorite movie?” That answer has been the same since I was 11 years old. But it also isn’t as easy to explain why I love some movies more than others.

As an art form, movies are by their nature interpretative. Some people will point to a film’s box office total as a barometer for a film’s quality, this might not be true again because although it might be popular to the masses it might not appeal to you. I am looking at you Avatar, which is not one of my favorite films, not by a longshot.  

Also, if the film wins an Academy Award for Best Picture, that hardly means it’s one of my favorite films, looking at you The English Patient, in fact I hardly agree with the Academy. Having said that, I am sure that some people love Avatar and The English Patient. And that’s what makes movies so great.

I, also am not a professional critic. I love film. I try and find merit in all film. As a host of a podcast that attempts to give every movie a chance, I believe that is the best way to approach movies, let the lights go out and try and enjoy yourself. You might find a “diamond in the rough.”

When thinking of my favorite movies to share with you, my loyal listeners, I thought 100 wasn’t going to be enough. So, I am proud to present my 150 Favorite Films, right now. These will change, I know they will.

See you at the movies!

114. Hot Shots! (1991) Directed by Jim Abrahams

The Movie: Pilot Leland “Buzz” Harley (Bill Irwin) is suffering a malfunction on his jet. Buzz ejects a leaves behind his co-pilot Dominic “Mailman” Farnham (Ryan Stiles) to go down with the plane. Mailman survives, but as he sticks his head out from a tree, is helmet is now fashioned with branches that look like deer antlers. It so happens to be deer season and Mailman is shot and killed by hunters. This is a nightmare that hot shot pilot Topper Harley (Charlie Sheen) has almost every night.

Harley is asked to return to active duty by Lieutenant Commander Block (Kevin Dunn) for the U.S. Navy on a top secret mission called Operation Sleepy Weasel, being overseen by Admiral Benson (Lloyd Bridges). Harley can’t seem to shake his psychological problems that arise whenever someone mentions his father. He is ordered to see a psychiatrist, Dr. Ramada Thompson (Valeria Golino), who just so happens to be beautiful and the object of Topper’s desire.

Ramada however has a suave and dapper ex-boyfriend, Kent Gregory (Cary Elwes) who also happens to Mailman’s son and Gregory blames Topper’s father for his fathers death and thinks Topper is dangerous. Topper’s co-pilot and eater of Mailman Jim “Wash Out” Pfaffenbach (Jon Cryer) is one of the few people that give Topper a chance.

We learn that Lt. Block has brought Topper back for nefarious reasons. He has made a deal with a business tycoon Wilson (Efrem Zimbalist Jr.) for his new super planes, and if the mission fails then the Navy will be compelled to buy new planes.

On one of the last training missions, Topper oversleeps and Wash Out pretends to be Topper to keep him out of trouble. An accident occurs and kills Pete “Dead Meat” Thompson (William O’Leary). After the accident Block believes with the death of Dead Meat that should be enough for the Navy to buy Wilson’s jets, he however believes they need to fail in a mission.

The mission is finally revealed, they will attack an Iraqi Nuclear Plant. Topper is assigned to lead the mission, which upsets Gregory. During the mission Block mentions Buzz to Topper. Topper has a panic attack and is unable to perform. Block sensing that he has done what needed to be done is about to abort the mission. Before he can a squadron of Iraqi fighters intercept the Navy pilots. Block can’t allow the men to die so he sets the record straight and tells Topper that what he was told about his dad was not true. Buzz did everything he could to save Mailman but he was unsuccessful.

Topper snaps out of his panic attack and goes on to complete the mission. He even drops a bomb right on Saddam Hussein. The US is successful and Wilson’s plan is revealed. Back on the ship Gregory calls out Topper, but only to tell him he is a damn good pilot. He also gives Topper and Ramada his blessing to be a couple.

Why I Love Hot Shots! (1991): Jim Abrahams is responsible for some of my favorite comedies. (See #140 Airplane! and #133 Top Secret!). I just love parodies that have silly dialogue but the actors treat it 100% serious. Case in point after Topper is explaining why you play to win;

“My father used to say that not playing to win is like sleeping with your sister. Sure she’s a great piece of tail, with a blouse full of goodies, but it’s just illegal. Then you got into that whole inbred thing. Kids with no teeth, who do nothing but play the banjo, eat apple sauce through a straw, pork farm animals.”

There is an art to making films like this. Everybody has to by in. From Charlie Sheen carrying the movie to his love interest Valeria Golino being totally game and also delivering a hell of a performance. But maybe the MVP is Cary Elwes. His deadpan, on point delivery would serve him well here and he would parlay this role into another great spoof in 1993, Robin Hood: Men in Tights.

The plot doesn’t matter, just as long as it functions as a way to get to the next set piece. And Hot Shots! breezes by at a relentless pace that begs for repeat viewings.

Hot Shots! is a non-stop, Mach 3 comedy.

Articles, Top Lists

Ryan’s 150 Favorite Films: Number 115, Superman (1978)

One of the most frequent questions I am always asked being the host of the greatest movie podcast ever (opinions may vary) is “What’s your favorite movie?” That answer has been the same since I was 11 years old. But it also isn’t as easy to explain why I love some movies more than others.

As an art form, movies are by their nature interpretative. Some people will point to a film’s box office total as a barometer for a film’s quality, this might not be true again because although it might be popular to the masses it might not appeal to you. I am looking at you Avatar, which is not one of my favorite films, not by a longshot.  

Also, if the film wins an Academy Award for Best Picture, that hardly means it’s one of my favorite films, looking at you The English Patient, in fact I hardly agree with the Academy. Having said that, I am sure that some people love Avatar and The English Patient. And that’s what makes movies so great.

I, also am not a professional critic. I love film. I try and find merit in all film. As a host of a podcast that attempts to give every movie a chance, I believe that is the best way to approach movies, let the lights go out and try and enjoy yourself. You might find a “diamond in the rough.”

When thinking of my favorite movies to share with you, my loyal listeners, I thought 100 wasn’t going to be enough. So, I am proud to present my 150 Favorite Films, right now. These will change, I know they will.

See you at the movies!

***Spoilers Ahead!***

115. Superman (1978) Directed by Richard Donner

The Movie: On the distant planet of Krypton, Jor-El (Marlon Brando) a member of the Kryptonian High Council discovers that the planet will soon be destroyed. Jor-El is dismissed and ignored by the other Council Members. Jor-El takes action to save his child Kal-El by sending him to Earth. Jor-El is aware that Earth will enhance Kal-El’s abilities, giving him superhuman powers. Jor-El sends Kal-El away in the nick of time, Krypton is soon destroyed.

Kal-El’s spaceships lands in Smallville, Kansas. He is found by Jonathan and Martha Kent. They both are flabbergasted that this small child can lift their truck. The Kent’s adopt Kal-El and name him Clark.

Jonathan dies from a heart attack when Clark turns 18. Clark is drawn a green crystal in his spacecraft. Clark is summoned to the Artic, where he uses the crystal to construct the Fortress of Solitude. After he builds it a hologram of Jor-El appears. Jor-El spends the next 12 years teaching Clark about his powers and why he was sent to Earth. Clark (Christopher Reeve) leaves the fortress, but he is now wearing a blue suit with a red cape. He also has the House of El family crest placed on his chest.

Clark settles down in the sprawling city of Metropolis. Clark becomes a reporter for the Daily Planet at meets fellow reporter Lois Lane (Margot Kidder). When Lois commandeers a helicopter for a story, it soon is headed towards Earth. Lois and the pilots are saved however, by Clark, who unleashes his incredible powers for all to see. Soon sightings and heroic act from the “Caped Wonder” are all the citizens of Metropolis can talk about. At the Daily Planet, Perry White (Jackie Cooper) wants a story on him.

Lois scores the interview when Clark shows up at her apartment. Lois writes the article and dubs him, “Superman”. Superman has also caught the attention of Lex Luthor (Gene Hackman), who intends to detonate a nuclear bomb in the San Andreas Fault causing the West Coast to break away and he can rule the new West Coast of the United States. Luthor is aware that Superman could foil his plans. Luthor deduces that a meteorite that crashed into Earth and is from Krypton would be radioactive to Superman. Luthor lures Superman into his underground lair. Superman arrives but is weakened by the kryptonite and is rendered incapacitated by Luthor. Luthor taunts Superman and tells him that he is also sending a second missile, this one to destroy the city of Hoboken, New Jersey. Luthor leaves and his henchwoman, Eve Teschmacher (Valerie Perrine) assists in freeing Superman, as long as he promises to stop the missile heading to New Jersey first as her mom lives there. Superman flies and intercepts the missile to New Jersey and carries it to space.

Superman, however is too late to stop the other missile that detonates in the San Andreas Fault Line. Superman thinks fast and helps lesson the impact of the explosion by sealing the fault line. But although he stopped the west coast from breaking away from the United States, Lois Lane is trapped in her car and dies. Superman upset that he could not save Lois, defies Jor-El’s wishes to not manipulate history. Superman instead follows the advice of his “dad” and decides he is on Earth for a reason. Superman flies around the Earth in an opposite direction causing time to reverse. He saves Lois’ life and stops the missile from detonating. Superman delivers Luthor and his henchman to prison and flies away, into the sunrise.

Why I Love Superman (1978): Superman is not my favorite Super-Hero. In fact, he is far from it. I have always said though that if you can tell a good Superman story, you are one hell of a writer. Superman by his very nature is unbeatable. But he is also one damn fine person and hero. By exposing this all-powerful man to his failures, and how he rises above them makes for a great story. Superman 1978 does just that.

With superb direction from Richard Donner, and an all-time fun script, Superman outclasses many comic book films. There is something that is undeniable about Superman standing for “truth, justice and the American way”. And although that might be an antiquated slogan, it beams brightly in the film.

At the heart of the film is Christopher Reeve’s star turning and incredible performance as Clark Kent/Superman. Reeve brought the perfect blend of golly shucks of Clark Kent and the powerful and lovable balance of Superman. Margot Kidder is also phenomenal as Lois Lane. She delivers a great response to Superman’s “Easy, miss. I got you.” “You, you got me? Who’s got you?”

And you cannot talk about Superman without talking about John Williams’ fantastic score and theme for Superman.

Without a doubt, Superman is one of the first great Hollywood comic book films. It soars on the cape of a charismatic lead, fantastic score and heart pounding action.

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Ryan’s 150 Favorite Films: Number 116, Scream (1996)

One of the most frequent questions I am always asked being the host of the greatest movie podcast ever (opinions may vary) is “What’s your favorite movie?” That answer has been the same since I was 11 years old. But it also isn’t as easy to explain why I love some movies more than others.

As an art form, movies are by their nature interpretative. Some people will point to a film’s box office total as a barometer for a film’s quality, this might not be true again because although it might be popular to the masses it might not appeal to you. I am looking at you Avatar, which is not one of my favorite films, not by a longshot.  

Also, if the film wins an Academy Award for Best Picture, that hardly means it’s one of my favorite films, looking at you The English Patient, in fact I hardly agree with the Academy. Having said that, I am sure that some people love Avatar and The English Patient. And that’s what makes movies so great.

I, also am not a professional critic. I love film. I try and find merit in all film. As a host of a podcast that attempts to give every movie a chance, I believe that is the best way to approach movies, let the lights go out and try and enjoy yourself. You might find a “diamond in the rough.”

When thinking of my favorite movies to share with you, my loyal listeners, I thought 100 wasn’t going to be enough. So, I am proud to present my 150 Favorite Films, right now. These will change, I know they will.

See you at the movies!

***Spoilers Ahead!***

116. Scream (1996) Directed by Wes Craven

The Movie: Casey Becker (Drew Barrymore) is home alone. She is making popcorn and getting to watch a movie. Casey’s telephone rings. The person on the other side of the line is charming and at first Casey and the caller explain why the love scary movies. The man on the other line however, so turns their fun, flirty call into a sadistic game. Outside, Casey’s boyfriend, Steve (Kevin Patrick Walls) is tied to a chair with his mouth gagged. The man on the other line tells Casey that she must play a trivia game about scary movies or he will “cut Steve like a fish!” Casey terrified, agrees. She gets the first question right, but on her second question, “Who’s the killer in Friday the 13th?” She guesses “Jason.” She’s wrong and Steve is murdered. The killer sets his sights on Casey next. Dressed in a “Ghostface” costume, the killer chases Casey down and murders her as well.

When news of Casey and Steve’s murder gets out, the news media descends onto Woodsboro High. Student Sidney Prescott (Neve Campbell), her friend Tatum (Rose McGowan), Sidney’s boyfriend Billy Loomis (Skeet Ulrich), Tatum’s boyfriend Stu Macher (Matthew Lillard) there movie nerd friend Randy (Jamie Kennedy) all have theories on who the killer might be.

Part of the news media that arrived at Woodsboro is Gale Weathers (Courteney Cox) who is familiar with Sidney. Gale reported on Sidney’s mom’s rape and murder. Gale believes that Sidney identified the wrong person, Cotton Weary (Liev Schreiber) which puts her at odds with Sidney and her friends. Gale sets her sights on the lovable and gullible Deputy Dewey Riley (David Arquette) who is also Tatum’s brother.

That night Sidney is home alone and her phone rings. We the viewer recognize the voice as the killer. It also so happens to be the one year anniversary of her mom’s death. The Killer attacks and is scared away when law enforcement arrives. Billy happens to arrive at the same moment and a cell phone drops out of his pocket. Billy is arrested and taken to the police station for questioning.

Sidney goes to Tatum’s home. While she is there Sidney receives a taunting message from the killer, informing her that Billy isn’t the killer and that she is not safe. Billy is released and tells Sidney that the police now think that Billy scared the killer off. Unbeknownst to Sidney, the police now focus on her father Neil (Lawrence Hecht), after they receive an update that the number that called Sidney was traced to her father’s cell phone.

School is released for the day due to the murder, but Principal Himbry (Henry Winkler) doesn’t make it home. Ghostface kills him. To celebrate school being cancelled, Stu throws a party at his house.

Gale decides to go to the party as she believes that Ghostface will strike there next. There she flirts and starts to fall for Deputy Dewey who is there to make sure the kids are safe. Tatum enters the garage to get beers and is attacked by Ghostface. She attempts to flee and is caught in the doggie door in the garage, Ghostface operates the door causing it to go up and crush Tatum in the process. The party winds down after everyone hears about the death of Principal Himbry.

Sidney makes amends with Billy and they have sex. Afterwards, Ghostface busts into the room, stabs and kills Billy. Sidney runs away and goes outside and to Gale’s news van. The only thing she finds is Gale’s cameraman Kenny (W. Earl Brown) dead. Gale gets into the van and crashes it. Dewey in an attempt to save Sidney is stabbed in the back. Sidney grabs Dewey’s gun and retreats inside.

Stu and Randy emerge and accuse each other of being the killer. Billy is not dead, he is wounded and falling down the stairs. Sidney helps him up and gives him the gun. Billy shoots Randy, and reveals himself to be the killer. But, he is not alone. Stu reveals a voice box and that he is Billy’s accomplice.

Sidney asks Billy and Stu why they are killing everyone, Billy responds that Sidney’s mother was having an affair with not only Cotton Weary, but Billy’s father, which led to his parents getting a divorce. Billy and Stu further explain they killed Sidney’s mother and framed Cotton Weary.

Gale soon arrives and helps Sidney. Sidney uses this opportunity to beat the killers at their own game and taunts them into making mistakes. Sidney knocks Billy out and kills Stu by dropping a TV on his head. Billy wakes up and attacks Sidney, but Gale shoots him dead. Randy who is wounded tells Sidney this is the part in the movie where the killer wakes up for one last scare. Billy wakes up and takes a shot to the head, killing him for good.

Why I Love Scream (1996): Horror movies are a blast, not in spite of their cliches but because of them. Scream doesn’t talk down to the audience, it lets them in on the joke. We all know you don’t say you’ll be right back, because that is a death wish.

Scream fully embraces that the audience knows what is going to happen and yet it still delivers on all its promises. It also plays with your emotions. Right away you think, “Of course it’s Billy”. But, writer Kevin Williamson not only delivers him as the killer, he makes us question Billy as a suspect throughout the film, even though we know it’s him, making Scream one hell of a ride.

Wes Craven was the perfect director to bring Scream to life. He actually took a really serious approach to this type of storytelling two years prior in the criminally underrated, Wes Craven’s New Nightmare.

The cast is a who’s who of young talent that all deliver stellar performances. Neve Campbell as Sidney is one of the greatest final girls in horror. My favorite, however is easily Courteney Cox. She’s tenacious, a bitch and always gets what she wants. If Cox wasn’t so great at playing her she would be another villain in the film. Cox however turns her into a woman you love and love to hate.

Of course, besides the murder mystery, the biggest selling point to Scream is its all time great opening. Not just in horror films, but in films period.

Grisly murders, a murder mystery, likable cast and impeccable direction make Scream an all time horror great.

Articles, Top Lists

Ryan’s 150 Favorite Films: Number 117, The Amazing Spider-Man 2 (2014)

One of the most frequent questions I am always asked being the host of the greatest movie podcast ever (opinions may vary) is “What’s your favorite movie?” That answer has been the same since I was 11 years old. But it also isn’t as easy to explain why I love some movies more than others.

As an art form, movies are by their nature interpretative. Some people will point to a film’s box office total as a barometer for a film’s quality, this might not be true again because although it might be popular to the masses it might not appeal to you. I am looking at you Avatar, which is not one of my favorite films, not by a longshot.  

Also, if the film wins an Academy Award for Best Picture, that hardly means it’s one of my favorite films, looking at you The English Patient, in fact I hardly agree with the Academy. Having said that, I am sure that some people love Avatar and The English Patient. And that’s what makes movies so great.

I, also am not a professional critic. I love film. I try and find merit in all film. As a host of a podcast that attempts to give every movie a chance, I believe that is the best way to approach movies, let the lights go out and try and enjoy yourself. You might find a “diamond in the rough.”

When thinking of my favorite movies to share with you, my loyal listeners, I thought 100 wasn’t going to be enough. So, I am proud to present my 150 Favorite Films, right now. These will change, I know they will.

See you at the movies!

***Spoilers Ahead!***

117. The Amazing Spider-Man 2 (2014) Directed by Marc Webb

The Movie: In a flashback, Richard Parker (Campbell Scott) is desperate to leave his home. His wife, Mary (Embeth Davidtz) and his young son Peter (Max Charles) are rushed away after Richard finds his home office ransacked. Richard leaves Peter in the care of his Aunt May (Sally Field) and his Uncle Ben (Martin Sheen). Richard and Mary can’t escape their fate as they die in a plane crash.

Flash forward to a graduating high schooler Peter/Spider-Man (Andrew Garfield), and he is late to said graduation. But he has a reason, he is stopping a heist of an OSCORP truck that is under attack from Aleksei Stysevich (Paul Giamatti). Spidey saves mild mannered and shy Max Dillion (Jamie Fox), who becomes enamored with Spider-Man. Spider-Man stops the theft, and swings into his graduation just in time to get his diploma.

Peter relationship with Gwen Stacy (Emma Stone) is budding, despite Peter’s promise to Gwen’s dying father George (Denis Leary) not to see her anymore. Peter, is shock as he sees George everywhere and must deal with the guilt of him dying and Peter ignoring his wishes.

Harry Osborn (Dane DeHaan) is called back home. His father, Norman (Chris Cooper) is dying from a rare genetic order. Norman informs Harry that it is genetic and he too will succumb to the disease. Norman dies, and Harry is now the CEO of OSCORP.

Dillion is celebrating his birthday, no cares and is assigned to help in the research department. Dillion attempts to fix the issue and falls into a vat of genetically engineered electric eels. Dillion dies…or does he. Dillion awakens in the morgue and finds that he is now living electricity, he is Electro.

Peter breaks up with Gwen, and she informs him that she might be moving to England for school. Peter is heartbroken and follows her around town. Later, Peter and Gwen go out for ice cream and Pete’s Spider-Sense alerts him of danger, leaving Gwen behind.

Electro has stumbled to Times Square and cannot control his power. Spider-Man arrives on scene and tries to help Dillion. Dillion rejects Spider-Man’s help and unleashes an attack on Spidey and the citizens of New York. Spidey is able to subdue Electro with water and the help of the NYFD. Electro is taken to Ravencroft and placed under the care of the doctors there.

Peter and Harry reconnect after years of estrangement. Harry confides in Peter that he is dying and he believes that Spider-Man’s blood can save him. Harry asks Peter to find Spider-Man and ask him for help. Spider-Man arrives at Harry’s apartment and refuses to help Harry. Spider-Man says it’s because the side effects could be catastrophic.

Harry soon finds himself in trouble at OSCORP as well. He’s been ousted by the Vice President, Donald Menken (Colm Feore) who “blames” Harry for Dillion’s accident. Harry is out as CEO and he visits Electro, asking for help. Electro agrees and Harry frees him from his prison. Electro gets Harry back into OSCORP and Harry forces Menken to inject him with the venom from the spiders that gave Spider-Man his powers. Harry soon learns that the venom accelerates his disease. Harry crawls to armor that is in the OSCORP vault and it stops the mutation, but not before Harry becomes a goblin-like creature, The Green Goblin is born.

Peter finds his fathers secret lab, where he learns the reason both his parents fled was because he discovered Norman was going to use their research for biogenetic weapons. Peter learns that Gwen has accepted the Oxford scholarship. Peter tells Gwen he loves her and decides to go to England with her. Before Gwen can go to the airport, Electro strikes by causing a city wide blackout.

Peter reluctantly takes Gwen with him to a power station to help him defeat Electro. Gwen and Peter do just that and all appears to end well. However, a cackling laugh can be heard. The Green Goblin arrives and deduces that Peter and Spider-Man are one and the same. Angered by the slight, the Goblin grabs Gwen and takes her to the top of a clock tower.

Spider-Man and Green Goblin fight. Spider-Man subdues the Goblin but he has one last pumpkin bomb up his sleeve. The explosion causes the Goblin to be knocked out and Gwen starts to fall. Peter launches a web to save her and it catches Gwen. But it’s too late. Gwen dies from the jolt of Spider-Man’s web, breaking her neck. Peter, overcome with grief, quits being Spider-Man. Spider-Man is no more.

Some time has passed and Peter is sitting in his room hears about Aleksei Sytsevich has returned, this time with an armored Rhino suit. When a brave kid in a Spider-Man suit steps out to stop The Rhino, he is stopped, by the real Spider-Man. Who takes on The Rhino.

Why I Love The Amazing Spider-Man 2 (2014): Anyone who knows me, knows I love Spider-Man. I have a soft spot for everything that is Spider-Man. My favorite story, and I am sure a lot of Spider-Man fans as well, is “The Night That Gwen Stacy Died!” And although, The Amazing Spider-Man 2 is loosely-goosey with its adaptation, it still hits the right emotional beats.

The action is wonderfully realized. Especially the Times Square fight between Spidey and Electro. The colors absolutely pop off the screen. The slow-down and how Spider-Man uses his Spider-Sense is an highlight as well.

The Amazing Spider-Man 2 also has a great score. A mixture between full superhero orchestral power, mixed with the electric stylings of Electro, it hits all the right beats.

Andrew Garfield and Emma Stone have undeniable chemistry and you root for them, and it breaks your heart when Peter fails to save her.

The biggest issue holding the film back is how hard it tries to build a universe when it doesn’t need to. That alone keeps it from swinging to the heights of Spidey’s other adventures. That doesn’t deter me from enjoying the film immensely and having a blast watching it.

The Amazing Spider-Man 2 swings with powerful character beats, incredible action and a tear-jerking finale that packs an emotional punch.

Articles, Top Lists

Ryan’s 150 Favorite Films: Number 118, Freddy vs. Jason (2003)

One of the most frequent questions I am always asked being the host of the greatest movie podcast ever (opinions may vary) is “What’s your favorite movie?” That answer has been the same since I was 11 years old. But it also isn’t as easy to explain why I love some movies more than others.

As an art form, movies are by their nature interpretative. Some people will point to a film’s box office total as a barometer for a film’s quality, this might not be true again because although it might be popular to the masses it might not appeal to you. I am looking at you Avatar, which is not one of my favorite films, not by a longshot.  

Also, if the film wins an Academy Award for Best Picture, that hardly means it’s one of my favorite films, looking at you The English Patient, in fact I hardly agree with the Academy. Having said that, I am sure that some people love Avatar and The English Patient. And that’s what makes movies so great.

I, also am not a professional critic. I love film. I try and find merit in all film. As a host of a podcast that attempts to give every movie a chance, I believe that is the best way to approach movies, let the lights go out and try and enjoy yourself. You might find a “diamond in the rough.”

When thinking of my favorite movies to share with you, my loyal listeners, I thought 100 wasn’t going to be enough. So, I am proud to present my 150 Favorite Films, right now. These will change, I know they will.

See you at the movies!

***Spoilers Ahead!***

118. Freddy vs. Jason (2003) Directed by Ronnie Yu

The Movie: Freddy Krueger (Robert Englund) is trapped. Jason Voorhees (Ken Kirzinger) is “dead”. Freddy is pissed because the town of Springwood has figured out how to beat him. They simply made their children forget about him. Freddy can no longer manifest his demonic revenge if people will not dream about him. Freddy scours the bowels of Hell and he finds a monster he can manipulate into helping him. Freddy devises a plan that resurrects Jason. Freddy tricks Jason into believing that his mother (Paula Shaw) is asking him to go to Elm Street and punish the teenagers there. Jason rises from his grave and marches towards Springwood.

Lori Campbell (Monica Keena) is at a party with her friends, Kia (Kelly Rowland) and Gibb (Katharine Isabelle). Lori has been depressed since her mother was murdered and the boy she loved, Will Rollins (Jason Ritter) is believed to have just skipped town. Kia and Gibb have invited over a boy for Lori to meet, Blake (David Kopp). Blake is the friend of Gibb’s douchey boyfriend Trey (Jesse Hutch).

Blake and Trey arrive, bring beer and are looking to score with Gibb and Lori. Outside the home, Jason is stalking the teenagers. The power goes out and Trey and Gibb retire upstairs. Lori is forced by Kia to give Blake a tour of her home. Upstairs, Gibb takes a shower and Trey lays on the bed, reaching for a beer. Jason appears, stabs Trey repeatedly in the torso and folds the bed in half, killing him. Gibb finds a dead Trey, Gibb and her friends run out the door and onto the street. It just so happens a new cop, Scott Stubbs (Lochlyn Munro) drives by to help.

Lori lives in a very famous house, 1428 Elm Street. The home of Nancy Thompson. As more police arrive, Nancy overhears the name Freddy. The sheriff tells his deputy not to speak that name and takes the friends to the police station for questioning.

Blake now at home is sitting on his porch. Blake sees a goat in the street and goes out to investigate. There he is confronted by Freddy. Freddy however is not strong enough to kill yet. Freddy realizes that Jason will have to kill more, scaring the teenagers of Springwood some more. Blake doesn’t escape fate however. He wakes up from his dream to find his dad has been decapitated and he is killed by Jason as well.

Will and his friend Mark Davis (Brendan Fletcher) are inmates at Westin Hills, a psychiatric hospital. They are given a drug everyday called Hypnocil, it suppress their dreams. Will sees that Lori’s house is on the news again and asks Mark to help him escape. They both are able to escape.

The next day at school, Lori and her friends decide to attend a rave that is taking place in a corn field outside of town. Lori tells her friends about the dream she had and describes Freddy to everyone. Lori is shocked to learn that Will has escaped and see him in the hallway. The police close in on Will and Mark and they run away.

At the rave Will meets up with Lori again. Kia who relentlessly teases a classmate Linderman (Chris Marquette) is taken aback when he dishes it back. Kia likes his confidence and they dance. Gibb passes by Freeburg (Kyle Labine) who is describing how her boyfriend Trey dies. Upset, Gibb wonders off and passes out in the middle of the corn field. There a raver starts to sexually assault her. Gibb however is now in a dream and follows her dead boyfriend Trey to a silo. The silo morphs into a boiler room and Gibb is stalked by Freddy. Freddy moves in for the kill, but he’s too late. Jason beat him to it. This pisses Freddy off.

Jason in the meantime takes out many partygoers in spectacular fashion and Lori and her friends escape. Outside Lori’s home her father confronts her and Will. Lori asks her dad if her mom truly died in a car accident. He balks which makes Lori run to her room and escape out the window. She meets Will and they head over to Mark’s house. They are too late. They watch in horror as Mark is killed by Freddy.

The friends figure out Freddy’s plan and devise one of their own. They will go to Westin Hills, get the Hypnocil and make Freddy powerless as they agree that Jason is the bigger threat right now. Deputy Stubbs arrives to help them and they head to Westin Hills. Jason is not far behind.

At Westin Hills, Freddy posses Freeburg and dumps the Hypnocil down a drain. As the friends attempt to escape Jason’s wrath, he kills Deputy Stubbs. Freeburg, still possessed by Freddy injects Jason with a tranquilizer, subduing him. Freeburg gets sliced in half for his trouble.

Lori learns that she can pull Freddy into the real world. She devises a plan to pull Freddy into the real world and have him fight Jason, at Camp Crystal Lake.

Jason is now dreaming. His mother chastises him for not being able to stop killing. Freddy reveals himself to Jason and the two slug it out in the Dreamworld. Freddy throws everything he can at Jason. Freddy is shocked to learn that Jason can’t die. Freddy goes deeper into Jason’s mind and discovers how he dies as a child. Freddy sensing an opportunity attempts to drown child Jason, killing the real Jason in the process.

Lori enters the Dreamworld and saves Jason from certain death. Jason wakes up and causes the van that Will was driving to crash. Freddy attacks Lori. Lori seems to have missed her wake up call and Freddy decides to take his time killing her. In the real world, Jason is attacking Will, Kia and Linderman. Linderman and Kia are thrown against a wall, with Linderman suffering a fatal stab. Will puts Lori’s hand into the fire, causing her to wake up and pull Freddy into the real world.

Freddy vs. Jason is now on! They fight to a bloody stalemate and Lori causes the dock they are on to explode. Launching Jason and Freddy into Crystal Lake. Lori and Will believe they won, but Freddy emerges with Jason’s machete looking to land a killer blow. Jason however, stabs Freddy with his severed arm, dropping him to his knees. Jason falls into Crystal Lake and sinks to the bottom. Lori picks up Jason’s machete and decapitates Freddy.

The next morning, Jason emerges from Crystal Lake holding Freddy’s head like a trophy. As Jason walks towards us, Freddy gives us a wink.

Why I Love Freddy vs. Jason (2003): I have love Friday the 13th and Jason ever since I was a little boy. My mom and Dad would let me rent the movies, and thought I was weird. I was. And I didn’t care. The movies are fun and Jason was and still is my favorite movie monster.

The idea of Freddy vs. Jason wasn’t a new one. At the end of Jason Goes To Hell, the end stinger of Freddy’s glove grabbing Jason’s mask gave that awful movie some meaning.

It would take 10 years and dozens of scripts before New Line Cinema found one they liked.

I couldn’t wait to see Freddy vs. Jason. In fact, I saw it 5 times in the theater and I loved it. Is the exposition dialogue a little much? Yes. But you need it to set up the fight at the end. And this is where director Ronny Yu doesn’t let the fans down. Between the fight in the DreamWorld and the real world, every blow lands and the fight is creative. The film is gory and fun and a horror popcorn film through and through.

I also love that Freddy vs. Jason embraces what came before. Trust me the film could’ve been a lot different and not in a good way. A lot of the rejected scripts were/are available online. And yes, I read everyone. Most are bizarre and do not honor the films that inspired them. Writers Mark Swift and Damian Shannon understood this and wrote a film for the fans.

My only gripe with the film is that Kane Hodder is not Jason in the film. He was a champion of getting this movie made and they did him dirty but not casting him as Jason. Yu mentioned in interviews that he wanted a different type of Jason, more slow moving. Kirzinger is fine, but I miss the intensity that Hodder brought to the role.

Freddy vs. Jason is the heavyweight bout that has fans cheering for their favorite movie villain, and although it appears that Jason and Freddy fought to a draw, the real winners are the fans.

Articles, Top Lists

Ryan’s 150 Favorite Films: Number 119, Happy Gilmore (1996)

One of the most frequent questions I am always asked being the host of the greatest movie podcast ever (opinions may vary) is “What’s your favorite movie?” That answer has been the same since I was 11 years old. But it also isn’t as easy to explain why I love some movies more than others.

As an art form, movies are by their nature interpretative. Some people will point to a film’s box office total as a barometer for a film’s quality, this might not be true again because although it might be popular to the masses it might not appeal to you. I am looking at you Avatar, which is not one of my favorite films, not by a longshot.  

Also, if the film wins an Academy Award for Best Picture, that hardly means it’s one of my favorite films, looking at you The English Patient, in fact I hardly agree with the Academy. Having said that, I am sure that some people love Avatar and The English Patient. And that’s what makes movies so great.

I, also am not a professional critic. I love film. I try and find merit in all film. As a host of a podcast that attempts to give every movie a chance, I believe that is the best way to approach movies, let the lights go out and try and enjoy yourself. You might find a “diamond in the rough.”

When thinking of my favorite movies to share with you, my loyal listeners, I thought 100 wasn’t going to be enough. So, I am proud to present my 150 Favorite Films, right now. These will change, I know they will.

See you at the movies!

***Spoilers Ahead!***

119. Happy Gilmore (1996) Directed by Dennis Dugan

The Movie: Happy Gilmore (Adam Sandler) is a hockey player. Or at least he wants to be. He can’t skate, but he can shot the puck really hard and gets into fights. After Happy fails to make the hockey team again, he learns that his grandmother (Frances Bay) owes the IRS $270,000 in back taxes. Happy is told he has 90 days to repay the IRS or his grandmother will lose her home. Happy takes his grandmother to live at a retirement home with an evil orderly Hal (Ben Stiller).

One day while movers are at his grandmothers house they find a set of old golf clubs and start goofing around. Happy, irritated that they are distracting him from hockey tells them to knock it off. The movers agree, if Happy can hit a golf ball further than them.

Happy approaches the ball in an unorthodox manner. He stands behind the ball, rushes up and hits it. Happy learns that he can out drive almost everyone. After he earns money from the movers, Happy realizes that he can hustle money from people at the driving range. Happy’s power and unusual swing catch the eye of the golf course pro Chubbs Peterson (Carl Weathers). Chubbs tells Happy that he can enter the local tournament where the winner gets a spot on the pro tour. Chubbs explains to Happy that he could get a “gold jacket”. Chubbs said that Happy could be a player he couldn’t because an alligator took his hand when he playing a tournament. Happy refuses, but when Chubbs yells he could make a lot of money, Happy thinking of his grandma decides to enter the tournament.

At the tournament, Happy meets Shooter McGavin (Christopher McDonald) the number one player in the world and Virginia Venit (Julie Bowen) the head of Tour Public Relations. Virginia is excited because of Happy’s appeal to the average person. Happy wins the tournament and joins The Pro Tour, where he finishes near the bottom but makes money in the process. Also, his unorthodox antics draw the ire of Shooter.

Happy soon learns that although he has an awesome drive, his putting sucks. Not only that but his antics soon annoy Shooter, who believes Happy is a disgrace to the game of golf demands that Happy be kicked off the tour. Virginia explains to the commissioner of the Tour Doug (Dennis Dugan) that since Happy has started on the Tour, revenue and sponsorship is up. Virginia says that she will work with Happy to control his anger and antics. With the help of Virginia, Happy not only improves his behavior, he also becomes a better golfer. Virginia and Happy soon become romantically involved after they listen to “Endless Love” in the dark.

Shooter devises a plan to get rid of Happy. He hires a heckler named Donald (Joe Flaherty). Donald starts teasing Happy at a Pro-Am, where Happy is teamed up with Bob Barker (Himself). After constant nagging from Donald, Bob Barker tells Happy he is a terrible golfer and the two start fighting. This leads to Happy getting suspended and losing most of the money he has earned for his grandmother’s home.

Distraught Happy goes to Subway, where Virginia has an idea to get the money for Happy. Happy becomes the spokesperson for Subway. After earning enough money to buy back his grandma’s house, Happy picks her up and the head to her home. There, Happy learns that he has a chance to buy the home, but through a public auction. Happy is outbid by Shooter and makes a deal with him, he will quit golf if he loses at The Tour Championship. But, if Happy wins he gets his grandmother’s house. Shooter is more than happy (wink) to oblige.

Happy sensing that he needs to learn to putt, seeks out Chubbs for help. Chubbs agrees to help Happy putt. They go to a miniature golf course where Happy learns to find his “Happy Place” and become a better putter. Back at Happy’s apartment, Chubbs gives Happy a custom putter, in the shape of a hockey stick. Happy has a gift for Chubbs too. Happy killed the alligator that took Chubbs’ hand. Scared when he sees the head of the alligator, Chubbs falls to his death.

At The Tour Championship, Happy proves to Shooter that not only can he out drive him, but he has also learned how to putt. After three days of The Tour Championship, Happy is leading the tournament. Desperate, Shooter hires Donald again to taunt Happy.

The next day at the tournament, Donald runs Happy over with a car. Shooter tells Happy there is no shame in quitting, but Happy decides to continue. The assault has left Happy with the inability to out drive Shooter and worse he starts to play poorly. Shooter soon takes the lead and Happy is about to give up. Virginia, however points out to Happy that his grandmother is in the crowd. Happy tells his grandma that he won’t win her house back. Grandma Gilmore tells Happy that she doesn’t care about the house only that Happy is “happy”.

Encouraged by his grandmother, Happy starts to play better. Shooter starts to fill the pressure and finds himself tied with Happy heading into the final hole. Their Shooter makes par. Happy can win the tournament with a birdie putt. A TV tower, damaged after Donald crashed into it, crashes onto the green. Happy is told that he must play the ball as it lies. Virginia tells Happy to putt around and force a playoff after he makes the par putt. Happy, looking at the debris, realizes that the tower is mangled in the same way as a mini golf hole he was at earlier with Chubbs. Happy decides to go for the win and sinks the putt. Winning the tournament and his grandmother’s home.

Why I Love Happy Gilmore (1996): The early to mid 90’s were my Saturday Night Live. The performers on there during that time were my favorite. With Adam Sandler and Chris Farley being my most beloved cast members. So I was naturally drawn to anything that they starred in.

In Happy Gilmore, Sandler’s trademark humor is on full display. It is a man that won’t grow up, who is angry and funny. It also is really weird at points. Not quite as weird as Billy Madison, but it’s close. I mean at the end of the movie when Happy looks up to the sky he sees not only Chubbs in the heavens but also the alligator and Abraham Lincoln. It makes no sense but I laugh every time.

Happy Gilmore is also bursting with one-liners, that yes, I still say today.

“Gold jacket, green jacket. Who gives a shit?”

“I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast!” “You eat pieces of shit for breakfast?”

“How’s that nice girlfriend of yours?” “Oh, she got hit by a car. She’s dead.”

“The price is wrong bitch!”

I love when comedies fly by. Happy Gilmore never lets up the laughs or the fun, it delivers a hole-in-one comedy experience.

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Ryan’s 150 Favorite Films: Number 120, Mallrats (1995)

One of the most frequent questions I am always asked being the host of the greatest movie podcast ever (opinions may vary) is “What’s your favorite movie?” That answer has been the same since I was 11 years old. But it also isn’t as easy to explain why I love some movies more than others.

As an art form, movies are by their nature interpretative. Some people will point to a film’s box office total as a barometer for a film’s quality, this might not be true again because although it might be popular to the masses it might not appeal to you. I am looking at you Avatar, which is not one of my favorite films, not by a longshot.  

Also, if the film wins an Academy Award for Best Picture, that hardly means it’s one of my favorite films, looking at you The English Patient, in fact I hardly agree with the Academy. Having said that, I am sure that some people love Avatar and The English Patient. And that’s what makes movies so great.

I, also am not a professional critic. I love film. I try and find merit in all film. As a host of a podcast that attempts to give every movie a chance, I believe that is the best way to approach movies, let the lights go out and try and enjoy yourself. You might find a “diamond in the rough.”

When thinking of my favorite movies to share with you, my loyal listeners, I thought 100 wasn’t going to be enough. So, I am proud to present my 150 Favorite Films, right now. These will change, I know they will.

See you at the movies!

***Spoilers Ahead!***

120. Mallrats (1995) Directed by Kevin Smith

The Movie: T.S. Quint (Jeremy London) excitedly drives to the home of his girlfriend Brandi (Claire Forlani). They are about to go on vacation to Universal Studios Florida. Brandi however, is in a pickle. She volunteered to be on her father’s (Michael Rooker) TV show Truth or Date. The reason, T.S. told the woman that was supposed to be on the show that the camera adds 10lbs. Brandi informs T.S. that after she did that she went to the local YMCA and during her 700th lap an embolism burst in her brain, killing her. T.S. and Brandi argue and break up.

Brodie (Jason Lee) is awaken by his girlfriend Rene (Shannen Doherty) and explains to him that he is going nowhere and that she hasn’t met his mom. Brodie is too occupied playing video game hockey to care. Rene dumps Brodie and leaves.

T.S. goes to Brodie’s home and explains that he too has been dumped. Brodie thinks Rene broke up with him because she was going down on him and he farted. Brodie thinks T.S.’s plan to propose to Brandi after the shark from Jaws pops out of the water is the most romantic thing ever. Brodie sensing that they need to get out of their combined depression suggests they go to the mall.

At the mall Brodie is ran into by Shannon (Ben Affleck) the manager of Fashionable Male. Who hates Brodie. T.S. finds this shocking, believing everyone at the mall loves Brodie.

Next the boys run into Willam (Ethan Suplee) who can’t see the goddamn sailboat in the MagicEye poster. Willam also informs T.S. and Brodie that Truth or Date is being filmed at the mall and they enlist Jay (Jason Mewes) and Silent Bob (Kevin Smith) to destroy the set so the show cannot go on.

T.S. and Brodie next run into Tricia (Renee Humphrey) a 15 year old senior who is writing a book about the sex drive of men, called “Boregasm” She explains that she films all participants and rates them. Tricia tells Brodie she slept with Shannon and he told her that he hates him to his lack of shopping agenda.

Brodie learns from Tricia that Rene has begun seeing Shannon. Brodie sees Rene in a clothing store and confronts her. Rene tells Brodie that they are officially over and he leaves. Brodie asks T.S. to interfere with Shannon so he can talk to Rene. T.S. does this and Brodie sneaks Rene onto an elevator. They have sex and Brodie tells Rene that what he just did was passionate. Rene rebuffs him saying it was “too little, too late.”

Shannon finds Brodie, and attacks him in the hallways of the mall. He tells Brodie that he plans to have sex with his girlfriend “in a very uncomfortable place.” And it is not the back of a Volkswagen.

As Brodie is recovering he tells Jay and Silent Bob that the Easter Bunny is the one who attacked him, leading the boys to attack and kick the Easter Bunny’s ass.

Mr. Svenning has drugs planted on T.S. and Brodie which leads to them getting arrested and removed from the mall. T.S. and Brodie are saved however by Jay and Silent Bob who knock the no-nonsense head of security LaFours (Sven-Ole Thorsen).

The guys take refuge in the local flea market where they meet Ivannah (Priscilla Barnes) a three-nipple topless fortune teller, who gives them advice, which convinces T.S. that he must win Brandi back. The guys sneak back into the mall and instead of using Jay and Silent Bob to wreck the stage, T.S. has them get the other contestants stoned so they can’t go on.

As Brodie waits for the show to start, he is approached by Stan Lee (Stan Lee) who tells him story’s on romance and how he would trade all of his comic creations for one last chance at the love of his life. This convinces Brodie to win back Rene. We learn that Stan Lee was persuaded by T.S. to help convince Brodie of his true feelings, knowing Brodie would listen to Stan Lee.

T.S. and Brodie manage to sneak on the show and become two the contestants along with Gill Hicks (Brian O’Halloran). Their T.S. confronts Brandi and tells her that he has always loved her and proposes to her on the show. Brandi accepts, Mr. Svenning barfs, thanks to an earlier “stick palm”. The police arrive to take T.S. and Brodie into custody, when through the power of the Jedi Mind Trick, Silent Bob is able to play the sex tape between Tricia and Shannon. When Brodie tells the police that Tricia is only 15, they instead arrest Shannon.

As the credits play, T.S. and Brandi marry on the Jaws ride, Shannon is sent to prison, Brodie is the new host of The Tonight Show with Rene his bandleader, Tricia’s book is a bestseller and Jay and Silent Bob get an orangutan named Susanne.

Why I Love Mallrats (1995): Mallrats was the first Kevin Smith movie I ever saw. It was introduced to me by my good friend Joe at a cast party in High School. Soon, I became obsessed with Kevin Smith and his movies. Next was his breakthrough first film, Clerks, followed by Chasing Amy (more on Amy later in this article series).

I would go onto the ViewAskew website to learn all about the musings of Kevin Smith and what he was up to next. I still get excited to see a new Kevin Smith movie.

But back to Mallrats, it is one of the movies I quote the most.

“She’s fucking dead!” Is one of the best delivered lines in the whole film after T.S. learns that his innocent remark to Julie Dwyer has killed her and in a stroke of genius connects Clerks to Mallrats.

Being a comic book nerd the film is peppered with awesome references, funny anecdotes such as how Lois Lane and Superman can’t have sex without him “blowing his load like a shotgun right through her back.”

Mallrats has hands down the greatest Stan Lee cameo of all time. His interaction with Brodie is a scene stealer. (Followed closely by his appearance in Spider-Man 3, “you know, I guess one person really can make a difference. ‘Nuff said.”) Stan is as charismatic as ever and his monologue is so sweet and wonderful.

But perhaps the greatest gift Mallrats has given us is the talent that is Jason Lee. He is funny and brings great bravado to the role of Brodie.

I love Mallrats. It’s a film I watch at least once a year. And although I can quote it verbatim, it still makes me laugh.

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