Being a movie collector is lots of fun. You go to the store or the online site and shop for hours looking for deals on your favorite movies. But, a problem for me is I go to secondhand stores and will sometimes buy movies that maybe I wasn’t crazy about when I saw them but now it’s only $6, so I figure “Why not?”
I have mentioned before that my wife is supportive of my collecting, but she also gets annoyed because I buy movies and they sit on my shelf, never seeing the inside of my blu-ray player.
At first, I told my wife “I’ve watched most of them!” But recently I decided to separate the films that I have not watched. And darn it, my wife is right!
So, I took all those discs and placed them on the bottom of my shelf. My movies are organized alphabetically, so I thought for fun I would mix them up, place them back on the bottom of the shelf and watch whatever movie is next.
I will review the discs as it will keep my focused on completing my task of finally being able to tell my wife, “I have watched them all!”
Welcome to Blu-Buried!
House of Wax (2005)
On a trip to see a football game, Carly (Elisha Cuthbert) Paige (Paris Hilton) Wade (Jared Padaleki) Nick (Chad Michael Murray) Dalton (Jon Abrahams) and Blake (Robert Richard) decided to camp out before heading to Baton Rouge.
While they are partying and having sex, you know punk kid stuff, a truck shines its lights on them. Nick is a bad-boy and he throws a bottle of beer at the truck! The truck drives away in shame!
The next morning Wade’s totally awesome car will not start. So, Carly and Wade go to the next town to get a part. The town is empty except for a funeral service that they totally interrupt!
The meet the nice but somewhat strange mechanic in town, Bo (Brian Van Holt). Who tells them he will meet them at his garage in town after the funeral.
Wade and Carly explore the town and find a literal house of wax, (see what they did there?) exploring it they find it upsetting and scary.
The other cool cats attempt to go to the football game but too much traffic ruins their buzz and they return to their camp spot.
Carly and Wade learn that Bo does not have the right size of fan belt for his car. He tells the couple that he has one at his house. They reluctantly go there.
At the house Wade is attacked by Bo’s killer brother who kills people and turns them into wax figures!
How will these youngsters survive the night?
House of Wax is a remake of a classic film starring Vincent Price and like most Dark Castle films it completely ignores what has come before and turns it into a gory, somewhat uneven good time.
The cast is solid, yes even Paris Hilton. The only cast member that really got on my nerve was Chad Michael Murray’s Nick. He’s supposed to be this bad boy with a heart of gold and instead he is just douchy. The script however lets almost all of them down. The dialogue is sometimes groan-worthy, and the characters make some pretty bone-headed decisions.
The runtime is a little bloated too as House of Wax is a slasher film that runs nearly 2 hours.
I will commend director Jaume Collet-Serra though for letting the film breathe and at least giving us some character development, even if it’s not always good.
The films atmosphere is also great. From the somewhat 1950’s aesthetic to the town to the grimy and dark underbelly of the House of Wax the film looks great.
The gore effects are also awesome. House of Wax earns its R-rating with lots of blood and violence.
The video presentation on the blu-ray is really uneven and at times distracting. During the daytime everything looks sharp, from skin tones and clothes to the colors on the buildings. At night and in darker scenes is where this high definition really drops the ball. Crushed colors and lots of noise, it becomes distracting. Especially when the scene changes from more brightly lit areas to darker scenes.
The audio fares a little better as everything sounds pretty tight. The music gets loud anytime an attack takes place and the gory bits are appropriately squishy.
As far as the extras go, they are about as empty as Paige’s head after she takes a metal pole through it.
A weird one with the cast as they “comment” on B-Roll and Bloopers? It was awful. I really disliked Chad Michael Murray’s character in the movie, but he is worse on this feature. I should probably cut him some slack though as I am sure he thought like I did, what the hell is the point of this feature?
Also included is a couple of featurettes detailing the production, From Location: Joel Silver Reveals the House of Wax, in which he gets ran over while on the set of Kiss Kiss Bang Bang(seriously what is up with these features?) Wax On, which details the making of the House of Wax. The House Built on Wax, that spotlights the visual effects, An Alternate Opening called, Jennifer Killed. Another gag reel and a trailer. Not much here and half of it is really weird.
Skip the extras, they are lame.
House of Wax has a bloated runtime that only serves as a reason to cheer on the bad guys when they start killing the obnoxious characters. But I must admit I also had fun watching this film again. Pick it up if you like gory, violent slasher films, skip it if you like good movies.
Film: C+
Video: C-
Audio: B-
Extras: D-
Overall: C-